NEW INFO 5 Results from share redemption are posted. Less than .2% redeemed. Very bullish as investors are showing extreme confidence in the future of PLBY.
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/playboy-mountain-crest-acquisition-corp-120000721.html
NEW INFO 4 Definitive Agreement to purchase 100% of Lovers brand stores announced 2/1.
https://www.streetinsider.com/Corporate+News/Playboy+%28MCAC%29+Confirms+Deal+to+Acquire+Lovers/17892359.html
NEW INFO 3 I bought more on the dip today. 5081 total. Price rose AH to $12.38 (2.15%)
NEW INFO 2 Here is the full webinar.
https://icrinc.zoom.us/rec/play/9GWKdmOYumjWfZuufW3QXpe_FW_g--qeNbg6PnTjTMbnNTgLmCbWjeRFpQga1iPc-elpGap8dnDv8Zww.yD7DjUwuPmapeEdP?continueMode=true&tk=lEYc4F_FkKlgsmCIs6w0gtGHT2kbgVGbUju3cIRBSjk.DQIAAAAV8NK49xZWdldRM2xNSFNQcTBmcE00UzM3bXh3AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA&uuid=WN_GKWqbHkeSyuWetJmLFkj4g&_x_zm_rtaid=kR45-uuqRE-L65AxLjpbQw.1611967079119.2c054e3d3f8d8e63339273d9175939ed&_x_zm_rhtaid=866
NEW INFO 1 Live merger webinar with PLBY and MCAC on Friday January 29, 2021 at 12:00 NOON EST link below
https://mcacquisition.com/investor-relations/press-release-details/2021/Playboy-Enterprises-Inc.-and-Mountain-Crest-Acquisition-Corp-Participate-in-SPACInsider-ICR-Webinar-on-January-29th-at-12pm-ET/default.aspx
Playboy going public: Porn, Gambling, and Cannabis
!!!WARNING READING AHEAD!!! TL;DR at the end. It will take some time to sort through all the links and read/watch everything, but you should.
In the next couple weeks, Mountain Crest Acquisition Corp is taking Playboy public. The existing ticker MCAC will become PLBY. Special purpose acquisition companies have taken private companies public in recent months with great success. I believe this will be no exception. Notably, Playboy is profitable and has skyrocketing revenue going into a transformational growth phase.
Porn - First and foremost, let's talk about porn. I know what you guys are thinking. “Porno mags are dead. Why would I want to invest in something like that? I can get porn for free online.” Guess what? You are absolutely right. And that’s exactly why Playboy doesn’t do that anymore. That’s right, they eliminated their print division. And yet they somehow STILL make money from porn that people (see: boomers) pay for on their website through PlayboyTV, Playboy Plus, and iPlayboy. Here’s the thing: Playboy has international, multi-generational name recognition from porn. They have content available in 180 countries. It will be the only publicly traded adult entertainment (porn) company. But that is not where this company is going. It will help support them along the way. You can see every Playboy magazine through iPlayboy if you’re interested. NSFW links below:
https://www.playboy.com/
https://www.playboytv.com/
https://www.playboyplus.com/
https://www.iplayboy.com/
Gambling - Some of you might recognize the Playboy brand from gambling trips to places like Las Vegas, Atlantic City, Cancun, London or Macau. They’ve been in the gambling biz for decades through their casinos, clubs, and licensed gaming products. They see the writing on the wall. COVID is accelerating the transition to digital, application based GAMBLING. That’s right. What we are doing on Robinhood with risky options is gambling, and the only reason regulators might give a shit anymore is because we are making too much money. There may be some restrictions put in place, but gambling from your phone on your couch is not going anywhere. More and more states are allowing things like Draftkings, poker, state ‘lottery” apps, hell - even political betting. Michigan and Virginia just ok’d gambling apps. They won’t be the last. This is all from your couch and any 18 year old with a cracked iphone can access it. Wouldn’t it be cool if Playboy was going to do something like that? They’re already working on it. As per CEO Ben Kohn who we will get to later, “...the company’s casino-style digital gaming products with Scientific Games and Microgaming continue to see significant global growth.” Honestly, I stopped researching Scientific Games' sports betting segment when I saw the word ‘omni-channel’. That told me all I needed to know about it’s success.
“Our SG Sports™ platform is an enhanced, omni-channel solution for online, self-service and retail fixed odds sports betting – from soccer to tennis, basketball, football, baseball, hockey, motor sports, racing and more.”
https://www.scientificgames.com/
https://www.microgaming.co.uk/
“This latter segment has become increasingly enticing for Playboy, and it said last week that it is considering new tie-ups that could include gaming operators like PointsBet and 888Holdings.”
https://calvinayre.com/2020/10/05/business/playboys-gaming-ops-could-get-a-boost-from-spac-purchase/
As per their SEC filing:
“Significant consumer engagement and spend with Playboy-branded gaming properties around the world, including with leading partners such as Microgaming, Scientific Games, and Caesar’s Entertainment, steers our investment in digital gaming, sports betting and other digital offerings to further support our commercial strategy to expand consumer spend with minimal marginal cost, and gain consumer data to inform go-to-market plans across categories.”
https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgadata/1803914/000110465921005986/tm2034213-12_defm14a.htm#tMDAA1
They are expanding into more areas of gaming/gambling, working with international players in the digital gaming/gambling arena, and a Playboy sportsbook is on the horizon.
https://www.playboy.com/read/the-pleasure-of-playing-with-yourself-mobile-gaming-in-the-covid-era
Cannabis - If you’ve ever read through a Playboy magazine, you know they’ve had a positive relationship with cannabis for many years. As of September 2020, Playboy has made a major shift into the cannabis space. Too good to be true you say? Check their website. Playboy currently sells a range of CBD products. This is a good sign. Federal hemp products, which these most likely are, can be mailed across state lines and most importantly for a company like Playboy, can operate through a traditional banking institution. CBD products are usually the first step towards the cannabis space for large companies. Playboy didn’t make these products themselves meaning they are working with a processor in the cannabis industry. Another good sign for future expansion. What else do they have for sale? Pipes, grinders, ashtrays, rolling trays, joint holders. Hmm. Ok. So it looks like they want to sell some shit. They probably don’t have an active interest in cannabis right? Think again:
https://www.forbes.com/sites/javierhasse/2020/09/24/playboy-gets-serious-about-cannabis-law-reform-advocacy-with-new-partnership-grants/?sh=62f044a65cea
“Taking yet another step into the cannabis space, Playboy will be announcing later on Thursday (September, 2020) that it is launching a cannabis law reform and advocacy campaign in partnership with National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML), Last Prisoner Project, Marijuana Policy Project, the Veterans Cannabis Project, and the Eaze Momentum Program.”
“According to information procured exclusively, the three-pronged campaign will focus on calling for federal legalization. The program also includes the creation of a mentorship plan, through which the Playboy Foundation will support entrepreneurs from groups that are underrepresented in the industry.” Remember that CEO Kohn from earlier? He wrote this recently:
https://medium.com/naked-open-letters-from-playboy/congress-must-pass-the-more-act-c867c35239ae
Seems like he really wants weed to be legal? Hmm wonder why? The writing's on the wall my friends. Playboy wants into the cannabis industry, they are making steps towards this end, and we have favorable conditions for legislative progress.
Don’t think branding your own cannabis line is profitable or worthwhile? Tell me why these 41 celebrity millionaires and billionaires are dummies. I’ll wait.
https://www.celebstoner.com/news/celebstoner-news/2019/07/12/top-celebrity-cannabis-brands/
Confirmation: I hear you. “This all seems pretty speculative. It would be wildly profitable if they pull this shift off. But how do we really know?” Watch this whole video:
https://finance.yahoo.com/video/playboy-ceo-telling-story-female-154907068.html
Man - this interview just gets my juices flowing. And highlights one of my favorite reasons for this play. They have so many different business avenues from which a catalyst could appear. I think paying attention, holding shares, and options on these staggered announcements over the next year is the way I am going to go about it. "There's definitely been a shift to direct-to-consumer," he (Kohn) said. "About 50 percent of our revenue today is direct-to-consumer, and that will continue to grow going forward.” “Kohn touted Playboy's portfolio of both digital and consumer products, with casino-style gaming, in particular, serving a crucial role under the company's new business model. Playboy also has its sights on the emerging cannabis market, from CBD products to marijuana products geared toward sexual health and pleasure.” "If THC does become legal in the United States, we have developed certain strains to enhance your sex life that we will launch," Kohn said. https://cheddar.com/media/playboy-goes-public-health-gaming-lifestyle-focus Oh? The CEO actually said it? Ok then. “We have developed certain strains…” They’re already working with growers on strains and genetics? Ok. There are several legal cannabis markets for those products right now, international and stateside. I expect Playboy licensed hemp and THC pre-rolls by EOY. Something like this: https://www.etsy.com/listing/842996758/10-playboy-pre-roll-tubes-limited?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=pre+roll+playboy&ref=sr_gallery-1-2&organic_search_click=1 Maintaining cannabis operations can be costly and a regulatory headache. Playboy’s licensing strategy allows them to pick successful, established partners and sidestep traditional barriers to entry. You know what I like about these new markets? They’re expanding. Worldwide. And they are going to be a bigger deal than they already are with or without Playboy. Who thinks weed and gambling are going away? Too many people like that stuff. These are easy markets. And Playboy is early enough to carve out their spot in each. Fuck it, read this too: https://www.forbes.com/sites/jimosman/2020/10/20/playboy-could-be-the-king-of-spacs-here-are-three-picks/?sh=2e13dcaa3e05
Numbers: You want numbers? I got numbers. As per the company’s most recent SEC filing:
“For the year ended December 31, 2019, and the nine months ended September 30, 2020, Playboy’s historical consolidated revenue was $78.1 million and $101.3 million, respectively, historical consolidated net income (loss) was $(23.6) million and $(4.8) million, respectively, and Adjusted EBITDA was $13.1 million and $21.8 million, respectively.”
“In the nine months ended September 30, 2020, Playboy’s Licensing segment contributed $44.2 million in revenue and $31.1 million in net income.”
“In the ninth months ended September 30, 2020, Playboy’s Direct-to-Consumer segment contributed $40.2 million in revenue and net income of $0.1 million.”
“In the nine months ended September 30, 2020, Playboy’s Digital Subscriptions and Content segment contributed $15.4 million in revenue and net income of $7.4 million.”
They are profitable across all three of their current business segments.
“Playboy’s return to the public markets presents a transformed, streamlined and high-growth business. The Company has over $400 million in cash flows contracted through 2029, sexual wellness products available for sale online and in over 10,000 major retail stores in the US, and a growing variety of clothing and branded lifestyle and digital gaming products.”
https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgadata/1803914/000110465921005986/tm2034213-12_defm14a.htm#tSHCF
Growth: Playboy has massive growth in China and massive growth potential in India. “In China, where Playboy has spent more than 25 years building its business, our licensees have an enormous footprint of nearly 2,500 brick and mortar stores and 1,000 ecommerce stores selling high quality, Playboy-branded men’s casual wear, shoes/footwear, sleepwear, swimwear, formal suits, leather & non-leather goods, sweaters, active wear, and accessories. We have achieved significant growth in China licensing revenues over the past several years in partnership with strong licensees and high-quality manufacturers, and we are planning for increased growth through updates to our men’s fashion lines and expansion into adjacent categories in men’s skincare and grooming, sexual wellness, and women’s fashion, a category where recent launches have been well received.” The men’s market in China is about the same size as the entire population of the United States and European Union combined. Playboy is a leading brand in this market. They are expanding into the women’s market too. Did you know CBD toothpaste is huge in China? China loves CBD products and has hemp fields that dwarf those in the US. If Playboy expands their CBD line China it will be huge. Did you know the gambling money in Macau absolutely puts Las Vegas to shame? Technically, it's illegal on the mainland, but in reality, there is a lot of gambling going on in China. https://www.forbes.com/sites/javierhasse/2020/10/19/magic-johnson-and-uncle-buds-cbd-brand-enter-china-via-tmall-partnership/?sh=271776ca411e “In India, Playboy today has a presence through select apparel licensees and hospitality establishments. Consumer research suggests significant growth opportunities in the territory with Playboy’s brand and categories of focus.” “Playboy Enterprises has announced the expansion of its global consumer products business into India as part of a partnership with Jay Jay Iconic Brands, a leading fashion and lifestyle Company in India.” “The Indian market today is dominated by consumers under the age of 35, who represent more than 65 percent of the country’s total population and are driving India’s significant online shopping growth. The Playboy brand’s core values of playfulness and exploration resonate strongly with the expressed desires of today’s younger millennial consumers. For us, Playboy was the perfect fit.” “The Playboy international portfolio has been flourishing for more than 25 years in several South Asian markets such as China and Japan. In particular, it has strategically targeted the millennial and gen-Z audiences across categories such as apparel, footwear, home textiles, eyewear and watches.” https://www.licenseglobal.com/industry-news/playboy-expands-global-footprint-india It looks like they gave COVID the heisman in terms of net damage sustained: “Although Playboy has not suffered any material adverse consequences to date from the COVID-19 pandemic, the business has been impacted both negatively and positively. The remote working and stay-at-home orders resulted in the closure of the London Playboy Club and retail stores of Playboy’s licensees, decreasing licensing revenues in the second quarter, as well as causing supply chain disruption and less efficient product development thereby slowing the launch of new products. However, these negative impacts were offset by an increase in Yandy’s direct-to-consumer sales, which have benefited in part from overall increases in online retail sales so far during the pandemic.” Looks like the positives are long term (Yandy acquisition) and the negatives are temporary (stay-at-home orders).
https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgadata/1803914/000110465921006093/tm213766-1_defa14a.htm
This speaks to their ability to maintain a financially solvent company throughout the transition phase to the aforementioned areas. They’d say some fancy shit like “expanded business model to encompass four key revenue streams: Sexual Wellness, Style & Apparel, Gaming & Lifestyle, and Beauty & Grooming.” I hear “we’re just biding our time with these trinkets until those dollar dollar bill y’all markets are fully up and running.” But the truth is these existing revenue streams are profitable, scalable, and rapidly expanding Playboy’s e-commerce segment around the world.
"Even in the face of COVID this year, we've been able to grow EBITDA over 100 percent and revenue over 68 percent, and I expect that to accelerate going into 2021," he said. “Playboy is accelerating its growth in company-owned and branded consumer products in attractive and expanding markets in which it has a proven history of brand affinity and consumer spend.”
Also in the SEC filing, the Time Frame:
“As we detailed in the definitive proxy statement, the SPAC stockholder meeting to vote on the transaction has been set for February 9th, and, subject to stockholder approval and satisfaction of the other closing conditions, we expect to complete the merger and begin trading on NASDAQ under ticker PLBY shortly thereafter,” concluded Kohn.
The Players: Suhail “The Whale” Rizvi (HMFIC), Ben “The Bridge” Kohn (CEO), “lil” Suying Liu & “Big” Dong Liu (Young-gun China gang). I encourage you to look these folks up. The real OG here is Suhail Rizvi. He’s from India originally and Chairman of the Board for the new PLBY company. He was an early investor in Twitter, Square, Facebook and others. His firm, Rizvi Traverse, currently invests in Instacart, Pinterest, Snapchat, Playboy, and SpaceX. Maybe you’ve heard of them. “Rizvi, who owns a sprawling three-home compound in Greenwich, Connecticut, and a 1.65-acre estate in Palm Beach, Florida, near Bill Gates and Michael Bloomberg, moved to Iowa Falls when he was five. His father was a professor of psychology at Iowa. Along with his older brother Ashraf, a hedge fund manager, Rizvi graduated from Wharton business school.” “Suhail Rizvi: the 47-year-old 'unsocial' social media baron: When Twitter goes public in the coming weeks (2013), one of the biggest winners will be a 47-year-old financier who guards his secrecy so zealously that he employs a person to take down his Wikipedia entry and scrub his photos from the internet. In IPO, Twitter seeks to be 'anti-FB'” “Prince Alwaleed bin Talal of Saudi Arabia looks like a big Twitter winner. So do the moneyed clients of Jamie Dimon. But as you’ve-got-to-be-joking wealth washed over Twitter on Thursday — a company that didn’t exist eight years ago was worth $31.7 billion after its first day on the stock market — the non-boldface name of the moment is Suhail R. Rizvi. Mr. Rizvi, 47, runs a private investment company that is the largest outside investor in Twitter with a 15.6 percent stake worth $3.8 billion at the end of trading on Thursday (November, 2013). Using a web of connections in the tech industry and in finance, as well as a hearty dose of good timing, he brought many prominent names in at the ground floor, including the Saudi prince and some of JPMorgan’s wealthiest clients.” https://www.nytimes.com/2013/11/08/technology/at-twitter-working-behind-the-scenes-toward-a-billion-dollar-payday.html Y’all like that Arab money? How about a dude that can call up Saudi Princes and convince them to spend? Funniest shit about I read about him: “Rizvi was able to buy only $100 million in Facebook shortly before its IPO, thus limiting his returns, according to people with knowledge of the matter.” Poor guy :(
He should be fine with the 16 million PLBY shares he's going to have though :)
Shuhail also has experience in the entertainment industry. He’s invested in companies like SESAC, ICM, and Summit Entertainment. He’s got Hollywood connections to blast this stuff post-merger. And he’s at least partially responsible for that whole Twilight thing. I’m team Edward btw.
I really like what Suhail has done so far. He’s lurked in the shadows while Kohn is consolidating the company, trimming the fat, making Playboy profitable, and aiming the ship at modern growing markets.
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-twitter-ipo-rizvi-insight/insight-little-known-hollywood-investor-poised-to-score-with-twitter-ipo-idUSBRE9920VW20131003
Ben “The Bridge” Kohn is an interesting guy. He’s the connection between Rizvi Traverse and Playboy. He’s both CEO of Playboy and was previously Managing Partner at Rizvi Traverse. Ben seems to be the voice of the Playboy-Rizvi partnership, which makes sense with Suhail’s privacy concerns. Kohn said this:
“Today is a very big day for all of us at Playboy and for all our partners globally. I stepped into the CEO role at Playboy in 2017 because I saw the biggest opportunity of my career. Playboy is a brand and platform that could not be replicated today. It has massive global reach, with more than $3B of global consumer spend and products sold in over 180 countries. Our mission – to create a culture where all people can pursue pleasure – is rooted in our 67-year history and creates a clear focus for our business and role we play in people’s lives, providing them with the products, services and experiences that create a lifestyle of pleasure. We are taking this step into the public markets because the committed capital will enable us to accelerate our product development and go-to-market strategies and to more rapidly build our direct to consumer capabilities,” said Ben Kohn, CEO of Playboy.
“Playboy today is a highly profitable commerce business with a total addressable market projected in the trillions of dollars,” Mr. Kohn continued, “We are actively selling into the Sexual Wellness consumer category, projected to be approximately $400 billion in size by 2024, where our recently launched intimacy products have rolled out to more than 10,000 stores at major US retailers in the United States. Combined with our owned & operated ecommerce Sexual Wellness initiatives, the category will contribute more than 40% of our revenue this year. In our Apparel and Beauty categories, our collaborations with high-end fashion brands including Missguided and PacSun are projected to achieve over $50M in retail sales across the US and UK this year, our leading men’s apparel lines in China expanded to nearly 2500 brick and mortar stores and almost 1000 digital stores, and our new men’s and women’s fragrance line recently launched in Europe. In Gaming, our casino-style digital gaming products with Scientific Games and Microgaming continue to see significant global growth. Our product strategy is informed by years of consumer data as we actively expand from a purely licensing model into owning and operating key high-growth product lines focused on driving profitability and consumer lifetime value. We are thrilled about the future of Playboy. Our foundation has been set to drive further growth and margin, and with the committed capital from this transaction and our more than $180M in NOLs, we will take advantage of the opportunity in front of us, building to our goal of $100M of adjusted EBITDA in 2025.”
https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20201001005404/en/Playboy-to-Become-a-Public-Company
Also, according to their Form 4s, “Big” Dong Liu and “lil” Suying Liu just loaded up with shares last week. These guys are brothers and seem like the Chinese market connection. They are only 32 & 35 years old. I don’t even know what that means, but it's provocative.
https://www.secform4.com/insider-trading/1832415.htm
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/mountain-crest-acquisition-corp-ii-002600994.html
Y’all like that China money?
“Mr. Liu has been the Chief Financial Officer of Dongguan Zhishang Photoelectric Technology Co., Ltd., a regional designer, manufacturer and distributor of LED lights serving commercial customers throughout Southern China since November 2016, at which time he led a syndicate of investments into the firm. Mr. Liu has since overseen the financials of Dongguan Zhishang as well as provided strategic guidance to its board of directors, advising on operational efficiency and cash flow performance. From March 2010 to October 2016, Mr. Liu was the Head of Finance at Feidiao Electrical Group Co., Ltd., a leading Chinese manufacturer of electrical outlets headquartered in Shanghai and with businesses in the greater China region as well as Europe.”
Dr. Suying Liu, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of Mountain Crest Acquisition Corp., commented, “Playboy is a unique and compelling investment opportunity, with one of the world’s largest and most recognized brands, its proven consumer affinity and spend, and its enormous future growth potential in its four product segments and new and existing geographic regions. I am thrilled to be partnering with Ben and his exceptional team to bring his vision to fruition.”
https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20201001005404/en/Playboy-to-Become-a-Public-Company
These guys are good. They have a proven track record of success across multiple industries. Connections and money run deep with all of these guys. I don’t think they’re in the game to lose.
I was going to write a couple more paragraphs about why you should have a look at this but really the best thing you can do is read this SEC filing from a couple days ago. It explains the situation in far better detail. Specifically, look to page 137 and read through their strategy. Also, look at their ownership percentages and compensation plans including the stock options and their prices. The financials look great, revenue is up 90% Q3, and it looks like a bright future.
https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgadata/1803914/000110465921005986/tm2034213-12_defm14a.htm#tSHCF
I’m hesitant to attach this because his position seems short term, but I’m going to with a warning because he does hit on some good points (two are below his link) and he’s got a sizable position in this thing (500k+ on margin, I think). I don’t know this guy but he did look at the same publicly available info and make roughly the same prediction, albeit without the in depth gambling or cannabis mention. You can also search reddit for ‘MCAC’ and very few relevant results come up and none of them even come close to really looking at this thing.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gOvAd6lebs452hFlWWbxVjQ3VMsjGBkbJeXRwDwIJfM/edit?usp=sharing
“Also, before you people start making claims that Playboy is a “boomer” company, STOP RIGHT THERE. This is not a good argument. Simply put. The only thing that matters is Playboy’s name recognition, not their archaic business model which doesn’t even exist anymore as they have completely repurposed their business.”
“Imagine not buying $MCAC at a 400M valuation lol. Streetwear department is worth 1B alone imo.”
Considering the ridiculous Chinese growth as a lifestyle brand, he’s not wrong.
Current Cultural Significance and Meme Value: A year ago I wouldn’t have included this section but the events from the last several weeks (even going back to tsla) have proven that a company’s ability to meme and/or gain social network popularity can have an effect. Tik-tok, Snapchat, Twitch, Reddit, Youtube, Facebook, Twitter. They all have Playboy stuff on them. Kids in middle and highschool know what Playboy is but will likely never see or touch one of the magazines in person. They’ll have a Playboy hoodie though. Crazy huh? A lot like GME, PLBY would hugely benefit from meme-value stock interest to drive engagement towards their new business model while also building strategic coffers. This interest may not directly and/or significantly move the stock price but can generate significant interest from larger players who will.
Bull Case: The year is 2025. Playboy is now the world leader pleasure brand. They began by offering Playboy licensed gaming products, including gambling products, direct to consumers through existing names. By 2022, demand has skyrocketed and Playboy has designed and released their own gambling platforms. In 2025, they are also a leading cannabis brand in the United States and Canada with proprietary strains and products geared towards sexual wellness. Cannabis was legalized in the US in 2023 when President Biden got glaucoma but had success with cannabis treatment. He personally pushes for cannabis legalization as he steps out of office after his first term. Playboy has also grown their brand in China and India to multi-billion per year markets. The stock goes up from 11ish to 100ish and everyone makes big gains buying somewhere along the way.
Bear Case: The United States does a complete 180 on marijuana and gambling. President Biden overdoses on marijuana in the Lincoln bedroom when his FDs go tits up and he loses a ton of money in his sports book app after the Fighting Blue Hens narrowly lose the National Championship to Bama. Playboy is unable to expand their cannabis and gambling brands but still does well with their worldwide lifestyle brand. They gain and lose some interest in China and India but the markets are too large to ignore them completely. The stock goes up from 11ish to 13ish and everyone makes 15-20% gains.
TL;DR: Successful technology/e-commerce investment firm took over Playboy to turn it into a porn, online gambling/gaming, sports book, cannabis company, worldwide lifestyle brand that promotes sexual wellness, vetern access, women-ownership, minority-ownership, and “pleasure for all”. Does a successful online team reinventing an antiquated physical copy giant sound familiar? No options yet, shares only for now. $11.38 per share at time of writing. My guess? $20 by the end of February. $50 by EOY. This is not financial advice. I am not qualified to give financial advice. I’m just sayin’ I would personally use a Playboy sports book app while smoking a Playboy strain specific joint and it would be cool if they did that. Do your own research. You’d probably want to start here:
WARNING - POTENTIALLY NSFW - SEXY MODELS AHEAD - no actual nudity though
https://s26.q4cdn.com/895475556/files/doc_presentations/Playboy-Craig-Hallum-Conference-Investor-Presentation-11_17_20-compressed.pdf
Or here:
https://www.mcacquisition.com/investor-relations/default.aspx
Jimmy Chill: “Get into any SPAC at $10 or $11 and you are going to make money.”
STL;DR: Buy MCAC. MCAC > PLBY couple weeks. Rocketship. Moon.
Position: 5000 shares. I will buy short, medium, and long-dated calls once available.

r/nba thinks Vegas is overrating Warriors/Hawks, underrating Lakers/Rockets in latest Win Totals projections

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TEAM	nba Average	Vegas O/U	Difference
los-angeles-lakers	52	47.5	4.5
houston-rockets	38.2	35.5	2.7
milwaukee-bucks	53.5	51	2.5
denver-nuggets	46.8	44.5	2.3
memphis-grizzlies	33.2	31.5	1.7
boston-celtics	47.2	45.5	1.7
dallas-mavericks	44.0	42.5	1.5
los-angeles-clippers	47.7	46.5	1.2
washington-wizards	33.7	32.5	1.2
oklahoma-city-thunder	24.7	23.5	1.2
philadelphia-76ers	45.4	44.5	0.9
toronto-raptors	43.3	42.5	0.8
utah-jazz	41.9	41.5	0.4
indiana-pacers	39.5	39.5	0.0
miami-heat	44.5	44.5	0.0
portland-trail-blazers	40.3	40.5	-0.3
san-antonio-spurs	29.1	29.5	-0.4
orlando-magic	31.4	32	-0.6
charlotte-hornets	24.8	25.5	-0.7
sacramento-kings	27.3	28.5	-1.2
phoenix-suns	37.9	39.5	-1.6
cleveland-cavaliers	19.8	21.5	-1.7
minnesota-timberwolves	26.6	28.5	-1.9
chicago-bulls	27.5	29.5	-2.0
brooklyn-nets	43.5	45.5	-2.0
new-york-knicks	19.7	22.5	-2.8
detroit-pistons	20.6	23.5	-2.9
new-orleans-pelicans	32.4	35.5	-3.1
atlanta-hawks	31.8	35.5	-3.7
golden-state-warriors	32.6	38.5	-5.9

Back in March, long before a short seller would raise questions about electric-truck company Nikola Corp. and hasten its founder’s exit, early investors in the company were expressing concerns of their own. Those investors, led by mutual-fund giant Fidelity Investments, were worried that Trevor Milton, for all his brash visionary talk and Twitter braggadocio, lacked the ability that Elon Musk possesses to deliver these sorts of newfangled products to market. They lobbied successfully to remove him as CEO before the company’s June IPO and for Milton’s father to leave the board, according to people familiar with the matter. When the deal was done, Milton only held the title of chairman, the post he resigned this month.
The back-room negotiations show that Milton’s past was a concern to investors months before General Motors Co. executives placed a bet on the company in a US$2 billion deal carved out after the IPO. They liked Milton’s vision and his ability to raise cash and felt the venture was safeguarded from his shortcomings in operations by his push upstairs, say people familiar with the matter. Nonetheless, the events that have unfolded since the short-seller report, with Nikola’s stock plunging amid a steady stream of negative headlines, have exposed just how high the risks still were.
Now, it’s up to former GM Vice Chairman Steve Girsky, whose blank-check company VectoIQ took Nikola public via reverse merger in June, and Nikola CEO Mark Russell to stabilize the business and regain investor confidence. The plan with GM was to use Nikola’s hot stock and Milton’s ability to raise money to build a hydrogen-fueled trucking business with GM’s technology.
“There is obviously someone on the diligence side who isn’t going to get a nice bonus this year,” said Reilly Brennan, founder of the venture capital fund Trucks Inc. “The best possible thing if you’re a shareholder is that Milton is no longer running the company and you have Girsky as chairman and GM providing technology.”
The GM deal was originally scheduled to close Sept. 30, and the automaker has said it plans to carry through, but that timing may slip, say people familiar with the matter. BP Plc is still engaged with Nikola in talks to partner on a network of hydrogen fueling stations for fuel-cell trucks the company hopes to sell, but also is slowing the pace for a deal, said the people, who asked not to be identified discussing private information. BP and GM declined to comment.
Milton’s tale reads like a Greek tragedy. The report by short seller Hindenburg Research accused Milton of overhyping Nikola’s technology and has prompted investigations by the Justice Department and U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. A cousin has accused him of a decades-ago sexual assault, which he denies. The company’s value peaked at US$30 billion and is now worth about US$7 billion.
Girsky and GM Chief Executive Officer Mary Barra have both said publicly that they did plenty of due diligence. People familiar with the matter say that GM found out when scouting the deal that it had better batteries and fuel-cell technology but joined forces because Nikola had a working semi truck and access to capital markets. In addition, GM will get paid to build Nikola’s Badger pickup on existing assembly lines. Milton was so excited to get the Badger pickup program moving that he signed a deal that heavily favored GM, one of the people said.
Nikola’s stock and GM’s US$2 billion stake are worth less than half what they were on Sept. 8, when the deal was announced. Milton’s own stake is worth US$1.7 billion, down from almost US$5 billion at one point.
Milton said in a June interview with Bloomberg News that he grew up in modest surroundings in Layton, Utah. His family moved to Las Vegas when he was very young and he lost his mother to cancer shortly after moving back to Utah in the sixth grade. He wrote on Twitter he didn’t finish high school, earning an equivalency certification instead, and later dropped out of college. His Twitter account has since been deleted.
He grew up in a tight-knit Mormon family, according to Aubrey Smith, his first cousin. She went on social media recently and accused him of sexually assaulting her in 1999 when she was 15 and he was 17.
In a public account on Facebook and Twitter, and repeated in a phone interview, Smith said that Milton came onto her at the funeral of their grandfather. He took her shirt off without permission, Smith wrote, and then he touched her inappropriately before someone knocked at the door and she ran out.
Milton denied the allegations through a spokesman.
Smith said Milton raised money from family members to get his start. He founded and ran several businesses, including a home-security company that Milton claims he sold for US$1.5 million. Next, in 2009, he founded an e-commerce platform called Upillar.com, which Milton claims “pioneered the shopping cart online.”
Then he got into clean propulsion but ended up embroiled in litigation with dHybrid Inc., which he founded in 2009. The company retrofitted diesel vehicles with natural-gas-burning turbines, claiming the dual system had greater efficiency.
But a deal with Swift Transportation Co. in 2010 ended in court when Swift alleged dHybrid defaulted on a US$322,000 loan and that it retrofitted only half of the agreed vehicles. The case was dismissed in 2015.
Milton later tried to sell dHybrid to a company called sPower in May 2012 but that, too, got mired in lawsuits after sPower backed out and accused Milton of exaggerating its technological capabilities.
Amid the litigation, Milton started another company with a very similar name, dHybrid Systems, selling it in 2014 to Worthington Industries.
During an interview with Bloomberg in June, Milton said that dHybrid Inc. was a success but conceded that, “we ended up closing that one down because of some litigation.”
His next startup was Nikola, founding it in 2014 in Salt Lake City before moving to Phoenix. Emulating Musk, he took the name from the electricity pioneer Nikola Tesla, and the company was soon billed as the Tesla of Trucks. His plan was seen as potentially disrupting the entire transportation industry by making trucks that ran on batteries or hydrogen-fuel cells. He also planned to build a network of hydrogen filling stations.
Friends and Family
Milton had friends and family members working for Nikola despite resumes that didn’t match the job. His brother, Travis Milton, is director of hydrogen and infrastructure. His LinkedIn profile shows that most of his experience was being “self-employed” in Maui. The short seller, Hindenburg Research, said that Travis Milton poured concrete as a contractor. Milton’s father Bill was originally on the board but stepped down when VectoIQ took the company public.
The company’s stock prospectus said that Nikola had awarded more than 3 million stock options “to recognize the superior performance and contribution of specific employees.” The list included Travis Milton and an uncle, Lance Milton, the document said, acknowledging that they are relatives.
As Milton went public with Nikola’s technology, questions soon arose involving his claims about the company’s fuel-cell system. He bragged in an investor video in 2019 that the company had created “what other manufacturers said was impossible to design.” But while Nikola holds patents in fuel-cell and battery technology, most of its planned hardware was coming from German supplier Robert Bosch Gmbh.
Nikola Demonstrations
It became clear that Milton had gotten ahead of himself. A 2016 demonstration showed a truck that didn’t have a working hydrogen-fuel-cell system and was missing key parts, people familiar with the matter said in June. Milton said at the time that the parts were removed as a safety precaution.
In July of this year, he recorded a video of the semi truck in which he ran alongside the vehicle as it coasted at low speeds in a parking lot. Aping Musk’s combative social-media persona, Milton took a shot at his detractors saying, “these damned trolls, I wonder if they are going to apologize to everyone for the lies they spread the tens of thousands of comments about how fake we are.”
Girsky said in the webcast “Autoline This Week,” in which Bloomberg participated, that he has been in Nikola’s fuel-cell trucks and that they work.
Still, when the GM deal was done, GM will be supplying all of the technology for every global market except Europe. Nikola’s pickup truck, called Badger, will use GM’s Ultium battery, and the semis will run on a fuel cell developed by GM and Honda Motor Co.
Since Milton’s departure, Nikola has billed itself more as an integrator of other technologies into its Badger pickup and semi trucks.
For GM’s part, the automaker is protected from any financial downside. GM got 11 per cent of the stock for no cash investment and gets paid for its technology. If Nikola fails, GM won’t lose a dime.
Milton has remained silent and is out of the company. He unknowingly presaged his own downfall in the June interview with Bloomberg: “Part of becoming a better person in life is losing everything you have got and having nothing left.”
https://www.bnnbloomberg.ca/nikola-founder-milton-s-fall-reveals-what-his-backers-feared-1.1500376

Betting on Politics in Vegas

[Table] r/Music — HEY! This is Portugal The Man and “Weird Al” Yankovic – we make music – Ask Us Anything

Source
The AMA ended with the message:

Okay, gotta go. Thanks, everybody, this was fun! And thanks PTM! /Al

Questions	Answers
hello PTM! i dont even know where to start. I knew yall exist from the 2017 hit from Woodstock "Feel it Still", but i actually didn't know how great of a band yall truly are... You see, earlier this year around April/May I began to make myself monthly playlists with many new songs that i hadn't had heard. Out of sheer luck, I struck gold mine and found Purple Yellow Red and Blue. I heard the melody and i was absolutely mesmerized. Then you had me hooked. I explored through all your albums. This year i have listened to you more than anyone else, and I'm sure I will continue to enjoy listening to you again and again. My favorite songs from you are countless, but to say some : I absolutely love Atomic Man - what a great bridge and outro... perhaps my all-time favorite song from you (so many i cant even pick one) Purple yellow red and blue - one of the best melodies ive ever heard in my life... once listening to this, i can't stop singing along the chorus (same with atomic man; i love this one a lot) Waves - the one line right before the chorus " No One Cares About The Waves At the Bottom of the Ocean ". WOW. how can someone even come up with such a line... insane Evil Friends : what an intro! peaceful and slow, and that specific keyboard sound; perfect setup to set the theme for that song, also I love how it connects with the lyrics from the bridge of the Creep In A T-shirt! Holy Roller: "Another day feeling crazy, I try my best to keep my feet on the ground. I'm always all-around" are you kidding me? FABULOUS line. Noise Pollution : groovy chorus! love it. Live in the moment : absolute masterpiece - also what a legendary unique drum work! it's just awesome. INSANE. a close contender for the most favorite song from you, but Atomic Man is just amazing man. the intro, the verse, the chorus, the bridge and the outro. NOTHING BEATS ATOMIC MAN. Number One : perfect song for rainy days. the outro is a bit weird fo ngl Rich Friends : summer vibes. lovely. My Mind: nice stuff Shade : undoubtedly an amazing chorus - also another example of great drum work. People Say : yes sir! IT WILL BE ALL RIGHT. we just gotta make it through the night. Guns and Dogs : great song as a whole; especially when you slow down when you're reading the first few lines of the either verses. and ofc another great bridge. Plastic Soldiers : " COULD IT BE WE GOT LOST IN THE SUMMER!!!!" _________________________________________ I love all your works and I'm so happy that i have found you. definitely inspiring me as i also make little verses here and there. and besides that; it's just good times whenever I'm peeping your songs. Big ups! Keep up the good work. cant wait for more albums and more sogns. Please never stop blessing us with your unmatched talents. Also a suggestion; please please please! upload an acoustic version of your songs on Spotify! At least do one for the songs from Evil Friends! I can't stop watching the YouTube videos where yall are covering songs from Evil Friends :) love; ali	Wow thank you so much!!!! Hopefully we get back out there soon. We miss shows. /ptm
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any words on releasing acoustic versions on Spotify?! at least one for "Atomic Man" :( ? Also where can i buy some of your merch!!! (i.e. hoodies)	Online! I’m sure we have acoustic versions of AM on YouTube, but I’ll check out Spotify for sure. /PTM
In the song "The Biggest Ball of Twine in Minnesota", where did the family live? Where was their point of origin? They "drove for three whole days and nights" (stopping for pickled wieners now and then). If we assume a bit of hyperbole here, and perhaps they drove ~600 miles a day, that forms a certain radius around Minnesota of around 1800 miles. That's farther away than the corners of the country (San Diego, Seattle, Miami, Bangor). Of course, I'm assuming they drove in a somewhat linear fashion... it's possible they made a circuitous route (perhaps to visit the Shuffleboard Hall of Fame again?) Anyways, they crossed the state line around 6:39pm, and saw a sign that said Twine Ball in 50 miles. Then, of course, at 7:27pm the ball appeared on the horizon of the Minnesota sky. So the twine ball is somewhere within 50 miles of the border. That helps. It means they didn't cross the whole state of Minnesota on their 3 day journey. Can you shed some light on this? Thanks!	They live in Springfield, like the Simpsons. /Al
First, I'd to say thanks to both of you for holding this. Now, my question: Mainly relating to Who's Gonna Stop Me: PTM, why work with Al for such a serious song when he's known for much more lighthearted content? Al, why work with PTM on such a serious song when you're known for much more lighthearted content? I'm interested to see how both sides of this line up. Also, I'd like to take this moment to say "Happy (early) Birthday" to the world's chronologically second polka-loving, accordion-playing Mr. Yankovic! Lastly, as a mod, I'd be remiss if I didn't toss in a reference to WeirdAl, we're big fans of you over there, Al, and while you certainly don't have to, it would be awesome to see you popping in when you have some free time. I'll also toss in portugaltheman for balance but I know u/Rallier already knows about it.	There doesn’t need to be such hard lines between humor and heavy topics. Humor heals and connects people. Al is the best at that. /ptm
	Awww, you guys!! /Al
Al, I know your 1992 album Off the Deep End was delayed for a bit while you waited for a lead parody, but do you recall if you had any concern at the time that the parodies of acts like Milli Vanilli, New Kids On the Block, and MC Hammer were already stale by the time it came out, and is that why you followed up so quickly with Alapalooza?	When I was making albums, that was always an issue - I'd record a few parodies early on, and then by the time the album finally came out, those songs might be a couple years old (a pop culture eternity!). It was always a challenge to release an album without it sounding instantly dated. That's a big reason why I've chosen to forego albums, and now enjoy the freedom of just putting out anything I want, whenever I want... like THIS single! /Al
Hey, Al! You called me when I was in the hospital back when I was 12, sent me a care package, and invited me backstage at a concert that summer. Really saved me, and almost made having three brain tumors worthwhile. Thank you so much! Anyways, was the Larry in I Remember Larry based on anyone in particular?	Thank YOU - hope you're feeling better!
	And the Larry in "I Remember Larry" is Larry Fine from the Three Stooges. (No it isn't - I just thought for a second I should mess around with the Wikipedia entry. There was no Larry in mind.) /Al
Weird Al - You've been parodying pop music for nearly 40 years. Are there good pop songs that aren't good parody songs? If so, what is the main difference for you?	I don't think any song is beyond parody or can't be parodied, but there are a lot of songs (I'd say about 98% of them) that I'm just not able to come up with a clever enough idea for, and if at all possible I try not to force an idea if it's not working. /Al
Thanks for doing an AMA! @Mr. Weird Al- Has music gotten harder or easier to parody since everything seems to be a joke nowadays? @Portugal the Man I don't really know you guys but my friend Sam loves you, so keep it up!	Pop culture has always inherently been pretty ridiculous, so I don't think that's changed too much. The 3 main reasons why I haven't been more prolific in the last few years are 1) I've been putting my energy into a few non-music-related projects, 2) I'm lazy, and 3) I'm too lazy to come up with the third reason. /Al
	Thanks bud! /PTM
Question for Al: is it true that your next tour will be a world tour and will you be doing a show in Ireland? Question for Portugal, The Man: what was it like working with Al?	We were originally planning to tour early next year - now we're tentatively planning on LATE next year - but absolutely nothing is confirmed because, well... you know. And the plan and hope is that it will ABSOLUTELY be a world tour - if we're actually allowed to leave the country by that point. /Al
	He is the most fun and most talented person out there. He’s exactly what you would hope. /PTM
Something I've always wondered about artists - do you have all your songs memorized, even after years? Like, Al, could you recite all the verses to something like "Addicted to Spuds", or "The White Stuff"? I imagine you're super out of practice with them, but maybe the amount of time you spend meticulously writing them means they'll stick in your head forever.	Sometimes I forget the words to a song I've performed thousands of times. That's the only downside of performing live for me - I'm always afraid my brain is just going to shut down. Need more neurons!! /Al
	I think I know all the words to those still /ptm
Portugal, Evil Friends is likely my favorite album of yours. I love following the different themes in your albums and I am curious as to what inspired this sort of sacrilegious/dancing with the devil theme inherent in Evil Friends? Also, how was working with Danger Mouse?	It’s just a representative of the outsider. The outcast. Also a shoutout to unbelievable talented black musicians like Robert Johnson. People didn’t believe a person of color could be that good at guitar so he must have made a deal with the devil. Stand in solidarity. 🤘/PTM
First off thanks for doing a AMA, Weird Al you have had lots of great songs and their always funny. Why did you choose to make a serious song "Who’s Gonna Stop Me" with Portugal. The Man. How was making a serious song different than your normal song making process.	The process is exactly the same - literally the only difference is that the words aren't funny. And I wasn't actively looking to do a "serious" song, but PTM approached me about this - I love those guys and I loved the track, so I agreed to be involved immediately. /Al
Now that you’ve (finally) had a huge hit with “Feel it Still”, do you feel pressure (from the label, society, yourself) to “live up” to it and have another hit radio single? Personally, I’d be happy with another Evil Friends or ITMITC.	That’s why we did Who’s Gonna Stop Me with Weird Al, Jeff Bhasker, Paul Williams and Dodgr. Solid follow up. /PTM
How did you guys come up with the band name Portugal. The Man. (As opposed to Portugal. The Country.?)	We wanted to create a fictional character to represent all the people in the band. A country is one name for a group people so our guys name is Portugal. We wanted to separate it from the country because we aren’t from there. It was on the other side of the world and that’s where we wanted to go. See and listen and learn. /ptm
Al, favorite Portugal. The Man song? Portugal, favorite Al song?	I'm going to go with "Who's Gonna Stop Me" because it has more "Weird Al" Yankovic vocals than virtually any other PTM song. /Al
	I agree. /ptm
	I’m going to throw in Mellow When I’m Dead because my daughter has been dancing to it every morning. Punk Al! /ptm
How tough has it been for you as musicians during the Covid-19 Pandemic? And what's the highlight of it?	Because of COVID, I've been recording from home. Now, I don't have a full-on studio at home - it's just a laptop, a microphone, and a digital interface device. But that's how I recorded my vocals for "Who's Gonna Stop Me" as well as my vocals for the Gregory Brothers' presidential debate video. PTM's audio engineer was able to clean it up and make it sound better than I would have imagined. /Al
	We miss touring and shows, but it’s nice to actually spend time at home with our families. More than we’ve got since we were kids. /PTM
Portugal. The Man- Y’all are my absolute favorite band ever. I moved to Alaska from Florida in July and am absolutely in love with this State. What is something unique to Alaska that you wish more people knew? How can people local to Alaska be a part of the Portugal. The Man Foundation?	Big move!!! Learn and support Indigenous culture! Say hello to our home! We miss it. /ptm
Hey Al. How did you find finally not having a record deal after so many years of having one? Also any reason why the last two tours never came to Australia?	It's great not feeling like I OWE anybody anything. And it's also nice not having to get anybody's written permission if I want to do an outside project. Having said that, my record label was very good to me, and I appreciate all the support over the years.
	And there's no good reason why our last two tours didn't make it to Australia. We tried, but the logistics just didn't work out. Hopefully we'll see you on the next one! /Al
How did you guys meet each other? Portugal. The Man and Weird Al is the combo we never knew we needed	We met in 2013 when we were rehearsing for a live webcast called BLAM - it was to announce all the acts that were going to be playing at Bonnaroo that year, and it was wrapped in an hour-long "comedy" show. From what I remember, the show itself was a bit of a train wreck - my personal highlights were definitely the songs that PTM and I played together. I played accordion on "So American" and they backed me up on "Canadian Idiot." It's all online somewhere if you want to search for it. /Al
	Bonnarroo announcement back in 13’. /PTM
Any likelihood an acoustic version of Evil Friends will ever come out? Personally Majestic Majesty has been my favorite album of y'all's to go back to Also @weirdAl, you defined my childhood and made me interested in music that takes its lyrics seriously	Not a bad idea... /ptm
Hey, Al and PTM, I have a question for Mr. Yankovic. What instruments do you know and how long have you been playing them? I'm a huge fan of your stuff.	Thanks! The accordion is the only instrument I play fairly well. I play a TON of instruments extremely poorly (and you can too!) /Al
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Didn't you actually play the keyboard in your songs pre-1990 though?	Yes, and I still play the keyboard, but I'm really only good with my right hand (my left hand is used to playing buttons!) /Al
^{the following is another answer to the original question}	We all kinda play a bit of everything. Jack (and Jill) OG all trades, master of nine. /PTM
hi guys!! yall's new song is really really good!!!im terrible with questions, so i guess this one goes to al - did you decide to collab with portugal. the man by your own terms or did they reach out to you and want to do so? either way is super cool!(btw big fan since i was little thank you for being really cool!!!!!!) edit: OH one more thing: al, i've heard you like oingo boingo - do you have a favorite album by them? or a favorite song?	PTM and I have been friends for years - they approached me, and I jumped at the chance to work with them again. And I love all Oingo Boingo, but I think my favorite might be their original debut EP. /Al
Hi Al! I met you at the art gallery in LA in December, cried after meeting you and cried through the first 10 minutes of your concert at Greek Theater last year. And I'll probably cry again many times thinking about it. Heck, i'm tearing up right now! For PTM and Al - Is there a band/singeceleb that makes you happy that you would cry? Or if you met them you would cry from happiness?	Al. /PTM.
Al, thank you for being the soundtrack to my 12 year-old's life. The Stitcher recordings of "The Ridiculously Self-Indulgent, Ill-Advised Vanity Tour" were our accompaniment on the drive to school for his entire fifth grade. It is always exciting to hear how you tailor your shows to the audience. Last year, we saw you at the Ascend Amphitheater on the "Strings Attached" tour, and when you came through the audience, my son went nuts. It was all he could talk about for the rest of the year... "I WAS WITHIN FIVE FEET OF WEIRD AL!" Here's hoping we have a vaccine soon so that you can come back to Nashville! And thanks for introducing us to PTM!	That's so great to hear. Thanks so much - hope to see you in person again sometime soon! /Al
Mr weird al yankovic can we ever except to see a full non comedy album sometime in the future?	Absolutely!! But not from me, of course. /Al
This one goes for both of you! FAVORITE MOVIE??? Love you guys <3	Top Secret! (That's the name of the movie, I'm not saying that I won't tell you.) /Al
	2001 /ptm
Does the magical floating orb still exist?	I see it every time I close my eyes. /Al
Hey guys! I really loved the new song! Can we expect more collaboration between you guys in the future? I would love to hear more serious stuff from you, Al, it’s lovely!	I certainly hope so! /ptm
Hey guys! You've been my favorite band since Censored Colors was released and I'm so happy for all the success you have found over the last few years. My favorite song of yours is Mornings, it cuts my soul DEEP. Was wondering if you would wanna talk a bit about the lyrics and what the song means to you. Love you guys!	Thanks a bunch! That album has some of my favorite lyrics for sure. A lot of growing up in Alaska and reincarnation. Life and death and everything in between /ptm
I bet you know some really awesome vegetarian recipes. What are one or two of your favs? I want to add more vegetarian food into my life. Don't need the full recipe, just a good idea of what to look for! :)	I've got this one for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. You spread peanut butter on one slice of bread, and jelly on the other, and then you stick them together - yummy!! /Al
Would you like to take a survey? Do you eat beans? Would you like to see a new movie starring George Wendt? Do you eat beans with George Wendt? Would you like to see George Wendt eating beans in a movie? Do you eat beans at George Wendt movies? Would you like to see George Wendt in a bean eating movie? How many beans do you eat at George Wendt bean eating movies? How many bean eating movies have you seen with George Wendt? If you were a bean what kind of bean would you be?	The magical fruit. /ptm
Al, did you enjoy working on non-comedic music with Portugal the Man? Have you thought about doing that kind of thing more in the future?	I had an absolute blast doing this with PTM and would work with them again anytime. And this is not signaling any kind of new direction for me - I have no intention of ever "going serious" - but I also like the freedom of leaving myself open to whatever opportunities come my way. /Al
You've brought great joy to so many people, and that my friend is a life well lived. Thank you for sharing yourself with us over all these years! Question: Do you have any "serious" songs that you have written but are keeping to yourself? If so, would you ever get the point of releasing any of them?	Every time I've tried to write "serious" lyrics, it feels like I'm going against my DNA. That's just not how my brain is wired. There are plenty other people that can write sincere, heartfelt, non-ironic lyrics - and I'm happy to leave that to them. /Al
Hey Al and PTM! Last week during the Save the Stages show that PTM graced us with, there was a message projected behind the band talking about how the crowd reminded you of your 2007 tour, joking about how little of a crowd you had at those shows. I was at one of those, at Jack Rabbits in Jacksonville, FL, and sure enough there was only like a dozen people there. But it was a fantastic, intimate show that me and my friends will never forget. We even got to hang with you guys at the bar before and after, and created some wonderful memories. How did the low turnout on that tour have an effect on where your music took you creatively? And for Al, what are some memories you have of small crowds when you were starting out? And did it have an effect on you creatively? Neither of you let it seem to discourage you, and the world is a better place with your music in it! So thank you for the wonderful memories and music!	Someone stole my passport off stage that night! Ha. /ptm
Stoked on the new song. Any timeline for an album any time soon?	I'm not really doing albums any more - I just put out tracks whenever the mood strikes. But I've got a couple exciting projects in development - nothing I can talk about yet, though - sorry! /Al
^{the below has been split into two}
Hi Al! I have two questions for you: 1.) What's the biggest change (or changes) in the music industry you've witnessed over the span of your career?	There are definitely more mp3s sold now than there were in 1979.
2.) Any plans to release Medium Rarities on Spotify and other streaming services?	That's totally up to the record label - I have zero control over that. /Al
I don't really have a question and I'm kinda late anyway so I don't expect a response, but I've been a big fan of PTM for 10+ years now. Easily the most consistently good band I've listened to in my life, your albums just don't miss the mark ever. And on a more personal note, John's "we don't need it" story about hunting with his Dad when he was younger had a pretty big impact on how I feel about interacting with each other and our environment, so a big thanks for sharing something special like that in a time where I didn't have that same figure to teach me first hand.	I love that story too. I always look to music and other stories when things are lacking in my life as well. Appreciate all the kind words bud. /ptm
PTM, my religious mother is worried that my favorite band said “hail Satan” at the Grammys, always wondered the uhh.. intention behind that? Like is it a just for kicks kinda thing, metal kinda thing, do you guys actually worship Satan? Thanks	Na we worship no one. It’s a shout-out to Robert Johnson. Also we love metal. /PTM.
Hey Al, are there ever going to be video remasters of your music videos? ~~i want to help with them~~	Nothing planned. I kinda doubt they're ever going to look much better than they already do, sorry. /Al
Hey, thanks for doing this AMA! What's for dinner today?	La la la la lasagna. /PTM
	Beans. /Al
What are the most normal facts about you?	I weight more than 35 pounds and my blood is liquid. /Al
The album “It’s Complicated Being A Wizard” was astounding work. Where did that energy or inspiration come from?	That was all John. He usually does some solo after thoughts right when we’re done with an album. Also to annoy our dear friend and producer Casey Bates. Making a 23 minute long song for him to edit. I love that one too. /PTM
a question for Al: any interest in uploading audio of older concerts (exclusive parodies aside) as an official release so we wouldn't resort to finding fans' YouTube channels like some HOOLIGAN*? If not... what has been your stance on fans uploading older tours? for P.tM: favorite Weird Al concert memories?	Probably him jamming with us on stage in 13’. /ptm
Portugal. The Man: Modern Jesus and Sleep Forever seems to me to carry an agnostic message, which resonated with me and drew me further into your work. Just wanted to hear your intented message or interpretation. Also, your music gets me through the grind, thank you.	Both of those songs are about finding strength in yourself, friends and family. Which kinda makes sense from how you took it. 🤘/PTM
If you told teenager me anatomy of a ghost would break up, form a new band, and make a song with weird al....well I’m not sure I would’ve believed it. Nice work all around👍	I know right? Believe me, if you told me then what I know now, I wouldn’t believe it either. /ptm
Question for both P. TM and Al - how do you get in the creative mindset for making music?	I like to fish. /ptm
	Same. /Al
How dope was that tour with Minus the Bear in 2008? Would you tour with Al dressed as a bear, playing the accordion?	That tour was a blast!!! And yes absolutely. /ptm
Hey PTM and AL!! Loving the new single! This question is for PTM - after years of developing your sound and really going from underground darlings to mainstream rockstars, what would you say has been the hardest part of keeping continuity or a solid vision with your sound as you continue to grow? And how do you appeal to older listeners to continue this musical journey?	The solid vision of our sound is constantly changing. That’s the whole point. Evolution. /PTM
Hi PTM! Would you ever consider streaming a live set and mixing in some of your older stuff? I’ve gone to a bunch of your shows but the setlists are usually In The Mountain In the Clouds and beyond	Just did a bit! Planning on more for sure. We have a lot of songs! /PTM
Question for PTM. Loved the skit you did with the cast of it's always sunny. How did that come about?	We’re big fans of the show and have some buddies on the crew. They are all so funny and great. /ptm
Hey Portugal! Not sure if you’ll see this, but I just wanted to say thank you. During Hangout fest in May of 2016 you came onto our event bus and gave everyone on the bus free VIP tickets. It’s a memory my friends and I will always cherish. That was at the end of my sophomore year of college and is still one of my all time favorite memories. Hope to catch a show of yours sometime in the future.	Oh yeah!!! That was fun and a little awkward. Ha. Dude I miss Hangout. That place is a blast. /PTM.
To any: What's a little known fact about you?	I can juggle. /PTM
This one is for Portugal The Man. I want to know which pedals or effects were used on the bass at the beginning of "Feel it still". How do I achieve that bass sound that makes it sound like drops of water?	Reverb!!! I use the Surf Rider. Killer 60’s sound. /PTM
Not gonna lie. Your new music isn’t exactly up my alley but waiter: You vultures! will always be one of my favorite albums. I also remember seeing you guys with Minus the Bear and the big sleep in Grand Rapids Michigan back in my early college years first time seeing all three live and still one of the best shows I’ve ever been too.	Oh god that was my birthday night. Terrible things happened that night. Ha. /ptm
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Sound like a successful night then. Do you still have the red beanie with the big puff?	Ha. Yeah that was johns. Totally still have it.
Hey, you might not see this, but I'm really a big fan of your stuff, Weird Al. I've been listening to you for 4 years, and your stufd Is incredible. I almost saw you on the tour you did in 2018 (forgot the name of it), but I couldn't go due to a field trip that was scheduled the same day as the concert. :( Portugal The Man, your stuff is incredible as well! I enjoy the song you did with Weird Al. Anyways, the only question I have (for Al) is why haven't they inducted you in the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame yet? I think you deserve to be in there.	I agree. /PTM
AL: If you HAD to parody a PTM song, which would you choose, and what might the chorus be? PTM: If Al HAD to parody one of your songs, which would you choose, and what would you hope it's about? Dave & Ethan	Hey dudes!!! I’d leave that to him. But yeah I have some ideas. ☺️/PTM
Question for PTM - What are your top 5 tracks off of Weird Al’s album “Even Worse”?	This song is just six words long Fat Think I’m a clone now Good old days Lasagna
I miss your old albums with more experimental style.	A lot of people think we were more experimental. Honestly, we just didn’t know what we were doing or how to write a song. We would change keys and change time signatures cause we didn’t know how to write transitions. I love prog. But I’ve learned there’s a line between art and lazy. However.. I still believe that you should never follow rules that aren’t your own or someone’s that you respect a great deal. I love our old albums, but also look at them like shit we used to draw when we were kids. The feeling is right. And the feeling is all that matters. 🤘/ptm
whats your favorite color?	Oh gosh - probably either periwinkle or vermilion. DEFINITELY not chartreuse!!! /Al
Boxers or briefs?	Depends. (Mel Brooks joke FTW!) /Al
Portugal The Man - huge fan! What was the inspiration for Easy Tiger? It's so visceral and raw and I feel like it HAS to be sourced from someone or something.	At that time we were kinda writing to our 17 year old selves. Asking what we would have liked to hear and what we should hear. If that makes an sense. /ptm
What song on your playlist(s) would surprise people the most if it came up on shuffle?	Most of my songs would surprise people. /ptm
For PTM how do you feel about people being surprised to find out the lead singer is a man's voice For weird al who was your favorite celebrity you collaborated with for your parodies. For example key and peele in white and nerdy.	I’ve always loved female vocals and androgynous music. Always take it as a compliment /ptm
Hi, guys! What are you doing to stay sane with all the political nonsense and concert/party/gathering restrictions?	Fly fishing. /ptm
Weird AL, what's your favorite sit com and why is it 30 rock? I enjoyed your cameo in thst show haha, what was it like behind the scenes?	God we love that show. /ptm
This is for both of you. What do you want your legacy to be?	Inspire others to pick up an instrument or just use their voice. /ptm
This question is for everyone: do you have any advice for those who may be lost in life at the moment?	Now is certainly a crazy time. We are all a bit lost at the moment. I feel ya. /PTM.
Much love to the boys and Weird Al from New Orleans! I've seen you both play live there. My question is for both the band and Al: What is your favorite part about this city?	The food alone is worth the trip. /PTM
Al, My Wife and I are big fans of yours. My wife is generally not a music person (Crazy right?) but if I put on one of your songs she ALWAYS sings along. And that always leads to more laughing. My Question: What was you favorite song to work on? Portugal The man, How does it feel to know that something you made is being watched by millions of people? Great song both of you!	This has been wild! So cool. /ptm
Hey Al, was there ever a song you wanted to parody but just couldn’t think of good lyrics for it? Or have you written parodies and then scrapped them for not being funny enough?	I'm pretty good with figuring out whether a humorous concept will work or not... which is why I'm incredibly picky about which songs I choose to do. But once I've committed to an idea, I've never given up on it. Every song I've ever written has been released - there's no vault full of crappy material. /Al
Hey PTM, did you fan-boy tf out when you first met Al? What was it like to meet a legend who’s been with us since we were kids?	I like to think we played it cool, but probably didn’t. ☺️/PTM
Hey Al and PTM, I've been a fan of both of yours for many years now and I'm thankful for the great music and bad times you've both got me through. Have you guys ever considered doing a full covers album like Weezer did? I know Al did a load of covers on one of his recent tours, but I'd love to see more bands do studio versions of their own favourite songs.	Oh we cover songs constantly. Always rep where you come from and what inspires you. /PTM
Thank you for taking time for this Al! Several years ago you randomly appeared via video on WWE Raw to wish Hulk Hogan a happy birthday. Do you recall how you were approached for this, and was it just a one off or do you otherwise have an affinity for the world of Professional Wrestling?	Oh, that was just a personal arrangement I had with Hulk Hogan. I agreed to wish him Happy Birthday on camera, and he agreed not to beat the living crud out of me. /Al
Hey PTM! Big fan ever since ITMITC came out. Seen you guys prob a dozen times live or so since. I know that there’s been a huge increase in your guys main stream popularity over the last few albums. But is there any particular reason you guys rarely perform pre itmitc songs live anymore? Satanic satanist is full of bangers. Would give me left nut to catch mornings live sometime. Cheers dudes, stay silly.	We just did it!! We just have so many damn songs. /PTM.
Hey, I dont have a question I just want to say I've been a huge fan of both of yours. I saw Al once in 2000 and was going to see PTM but got too drunk before the show and got escorted out of the venue... Maybe next time. Thankyou for the joy and memories you all have given me and my friends.	Oh we’ve been there too buddy! Probably at one of our shows as well. ☺️/ptm
Al, because you captured my imagination -- and my deeply-buried craving to be a knucklehead show-off -- I've written parodies since the early 80's. Dude, you completely ruined me for writing serious songs. THANK YOU! I've worked at NASA for over 20 years since it was clear I'd never match your level of execution with the music gig. ;)	NASA!!! Awesome. /PTM.
I need to come up with two words to get tattooed on me. What should they be? Also for PTM, you guys rule! Oh and will you ever release any B sides or unreleased songs?	I’m sure we will eventually. We have hundreds. /PTM
@Al and @Portugal - If you had no obligations to anyone or anything - purely free will - how would you want to spend your life?	Outside. /ptm
Portugal the man’s album “Censored Colors” save me from killing my self in 2010, thanks so much guys! Not a question i just had to post	Dude! So glad you’re still here. That’s huge! That’s the best thing I’ve heard in a long time. Thank you. Really really appreciate that. /PTM
@Al and @Portugal - What are your top 5 favorite albums?	Dark Side of The Moon 36 Chambers Off The Deep End The White Album Give Me Convenience Or Give Me Death /ptm
Hey Al, how's your quarantine going? How have things changed for you in terms of day to day life and music production?	My life really hasn't changed all that much. I still wake up in the afternoon, eat a bowl of beans, do a Reddit AMA, and go right back to sleep. /Al
What’s your Waffle House order?	Smothered covered topped and peppered. /PTM
Walrus?	Little buddy didn’t make it. 😢 I cried a lot.
Hey PTM. How does it feel that Al's getting all the questions?	It feels like this is the way it should be. Ha. All good here. I would be asking him questions too. /ptm
Al, and PTM: would you rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumbtacks, or stick your nostrils together with crazy glue? Also, Al, huge fan. Your music meant a lot to me as a child, and now as an non-child.	Crazy glue. /ptm
Where can I send unsolicited demos of my music to become famous like everyone else	Send it everywhere. /PTM
@portugal luckiest fly?	My buddy makes a streamer called the Makiza maribou. Blue and black. /ptm
Al, I'm a lifelong fan, hooked since UHF. While you can't recapture the magic of that movie, have you thought about writing more films?	I wrote a screenplay last year. Will it ever see the light of day? Who knows! /Al
Who approached who to initiate this collaboration?	Oh we did it. 🤞/PTM
Hey PTM and Al. I've been to both of your shows and had a fantastic time at each one. Al, your set and costume changes were amazing. Also it was a pleasure to meet you after the show for a quick minute. My question for PTM is will you consider adding such epic wardrobe changes to your show?	Ha. That would be fun. John changes many times a day. I can’t do it. We’re not as good at the performance part of the show. We leave that to the greats. /ptm
Q for PTM - In a world where Al accepts parody ideas, what’s the parody you would pitch to him (Portugal The Man songs or otherwise) Q for Al - Last 3 vinyl records you bought?	I would let the master decide. /PTM.
Question is to both parties, appreciate both for doing this and thank you. Has drug use in your life been more of a deterrent to creativity or an invoker of it. In music it seems that often these substances can be entwined, what are your thoughts? Thank you again, awesome of y'all!	It can easily be both. Really depends on so many factors. I I enjoy those things, but it’s not a necessity for our creative process at all. /ptm
How did you guys come to meet each other? Plus, can we expect more new music from either of you any time soon? Big fan of both of you.	We met for the Bonnarroo announcement back in 13. We were so nervous.
PTM - What would be your dream song in Al's catalogue that you'd love to have been featured on? - Dave & Ethan	Yoda/ptm
P.TM, your music keeps my world rocking! Can we expect to see you in Europe anytime soon when the pandemic allows?	We miss y’all over there! Yes as soon as we can responsibly. /ptm
Hello from Alaska! Question for Al: I went to your show when you performed in Anchorage, Alaska (oh so many years ago). Assuming this pandemic thing gets squared away eventually is there any possibilities of you and PTM doing a combo show again up here? If you do can I get a front row seat? Just want to say that you all are awesome. Thanks.	Hello Alaska! /ptm
What’s your guilty pleasure?	I don’t really believe in guilty pleasures anymore. Like what you like! /PTM
Hi PTM. Saw you guys and experienced your music for the first time when you performed with Cage the Elephant and Twin Peaks at the Hard Rock in Las Vegas! One of my most memorable shows and you guys killed it. Thanks for the good time!	That tour was wild!!! Holy shit what a couple rad bands. Every night was one hell of a party. Miss all those boys. /ptm
Hi Al, I don't have a particular question to ask you.. so... what did you have for breakfast?	Beans. /Al
PTM, any specific artists that has influenced the sound of the awaiting new record? (Besides the great Alfred Yankovic of course)	The Beatles and Wu Tang.
Mr Al, As you are the Wicker of Yanks, has the queen given you any royal duties? PTM, do you feel inspired to make a cover album of songs you grew up with? Edit: also I can’t wait to have you back on Comedy bang bang.	Never thought about a whole album, but always throw them in the live set. /ptm
Both PTM and Al- Will you guys be working with each other again sometime? I would love to see more	I’d like to think so. /PTM
Do you still feel it?	New phone who dis?
What’s up with your obsession with Beavis and Butthead?	90’s kids. /ptm
Gentlemen, thanks for being here. I was going to say: “Who’s Gonna Stop Me” is a human feat of musical gorgeousness. Or maybe it's a musical feat of human gorgeousness. It thrills me and fills me with hope. It makes me feel floaty all over. I feel like it's the dream I've been trying to have. So, what do you think? Is it Love Boat or Musician Ship?	Love boat. And thank you. Love you boat loads. /ptm
What do you want for Christmas?	To hang with my Ma. 😇/PTM
Another question for PTM.. How was working with Danny brown? Anymore hip hop collabs planned for the future? Evil friends bumps	His shit is awesome. Yeah we have some stuff up our sleeve /ptm
If you were going backpacking right now, no restrictions, where would you go?	Alaska. /PTM
Just wanted to say you guys are awesome and I love how you answered most of the questions, keep up the great work and stay safe!	Doing what we can! You stay safe out there too! /ptm
Hey Al & PTM, What is your favorite Dinosaur?	Barney. /ptm
Just wanted to let you know you are my childhood Al. Keep on being amazing	Same. /PTM
Al, can I borrow five bucks? If not, PTM, can I borrow five bucks?	Sure /ptm
u/rallier when can we expect to see some vintage pieces for sale as posted on portugaltheman?	That’s the plan. /ptm

Can someone put this on WSB for me- they have upped their BOTS and new accounts cant post at all

The timeshare presentations in Nevada are gettimg out of hand...

“...and walk away with a trip to beautiful Las Vegas Nevada! Enjoy a complimentary 5 day 4 night stay at any MGM casino resort all on us! No nonsense, no gimmicks. Just a bit of your precious time! Call today!”
Yes. A vacation extravaganza all on the arm. Courtesy of the Hibou Timeshare Corporation. All it cost was your time and cooperation for a timeshare presentation. Simple enough yes? I wish I would have realized how much better a couple of overtimes would have served me, than taking myself to that horrid building.
I was living in Phoenix AZ with my parents. Still half way bullshitting my final semester at college. I’ve got to be honest, I was checked out. It was summer..I was going to graduate and I had these final two classes in the bag. I could have failed my finals and still walked out with a C. Yes but that kind of luxury came at a price. My social life was the casualty in all of this. While I did have a tight knit of pals, my attendance to social gatherings were...well..less than punctual. I was usually doing work for one of my advanced classes. If not that, then I was pulling a shift at either of my jobs. Yeah..you could say I gave up the glamour of late night pizzas, puking in my friends car and hooking up with a random ASU frat sluts for a heavier wallet...except I was paying everything out of my own pocket. My gas, insurance, cell, college. I wasn't exactly hiding cash in the walls. My parents worked hard but..never did make a living to give me and my siblings an extravagant lifestyle. We were grateful though.
So when I heard that AD of how I could get a long needed vacation to party central Las Vegas, all for watching some BS timeshare I knew I wasn’t going to buy into, you bet your ass off I made that call. The phone only rang once before I got an answer,
“Thank you for calling the Hibou Timeshare Corporation, how can we help you?” a voice rang through the phone. The voice sounded shrill and sickly.
“Hi, I'm calling about the vacation in Vegas? Says that you need people for a presen..”
“Yeessss.” the voice interrupted “The timeshare presentation, well...we would be so honored to have you”
“Uhh..yeah...anyway I’d like to sign up? Is there a form online or do you take the information here?” I said..now feeling a bit tense.
“Well I'll tell you what...pack your things for the vacation. When we are finished presenting..we can send you on our way to Vegas. We just need..a bit of your time.”
That was that. He gave me the address, date and time of the meeting. The area was in a place called Amargosa Valley in Nevada. Luckily it was just about an hour away from Vegas. Before we parted ways on the phone, the operator said something...he said something that should have been a MAJOR red flag.
“Okay then, you’re all set...we will see you July 28th at 4:30pm. Not a moment later” he laughed
“Oh..and..one more thing, if you have some more specimens like yourself that might be interested in the free vacation...bring them along. They’ll all receive the same prize and you will receive $100 cash for every person you bring. We look forward to presenting you, Austin. Good day.”
I never gave him my name.
Still, my young dumb brain didn’t hear anything past $100 dollars. So I rounded up a few of my best pals and we were set to meet the reps over at the timeshare. The days leading up to the trip I couldn't get a hold of myself. It was so exciting. My first real vacation in...i couldn't remember how long. I longed for this type of adventure with my friends. We packed a truck full and set off to Amargosa Valley.
I brought Luke, Larry and Adam. We’d been friends since the 3rd grade. We all moved to AZ from different parts of the country that summer, so being new kids we naturally ganged up together. Luke was from Texas..we called him Tex. Real big guy. Loved to work out but definitely was a bit of a boozebag. Larry was from Ohio. Quiet in public but probably the loudest of us all. Always had some political conspiracy to talk about. Then Adam..Adam was interesting. He was from Florida...or Georgia...or Nebraska. Adam never could keep it straight about where he was from. He always had some sort of story and backtrack about where he’d come from. I personally thought he was probably from another part of AZ and just wanted to fit in...so we humor him and let him be the nomad of our group. I myself was originally from California...things got pricey so we made the move to blistering AZ.
That was my crew. No matter how long it had been, we were always as tight as ever. The ride was filled with laughing and gags. Stops at fast food joints and all around bullshitting. Yes it was an amazing time just driving there, we couldn't wait to get on with the meeting and head down to Boozeville USA. As we approached our destination...something felt off. Amargosa Valley had been a bit of a ghost town the whole drive. A gas station here. A small outlet there...but otherwise unpopulated. When we hit our destination we were met by a Chrome building. Smack center in the middle of the highway. As we parked at the only stall..we all took a look at each other.
“Well this is...odd.” Luke said plainly.
“Yeah man...are we really going there?” Adam shook out. Barely containing his fear.
“Look guys, I know it looks weird. This place is really clean and bright in the middle of a dusty desert but c’mon. It's like what...an hour of our time? Within 2 hours we’ll be on our way to the dopest guys trip ever.” I said...selfishly.
The guys all agreed. We got out, locked the car up and walked in through the sliding glass doors. The cool air hit us like a wave. Each of us breathing in the refreshingly cold air. The inside of this lobby..was also immaculate. Chrome everywhere. Right down to the sofas and chairs. A woman came from around the front desk.
“You must be here to be presented. I see you brought more specimens! What a joy! Will you gentlemen please follow me?” She said.
Specimens. Ugh. Her tone. That word still makes me shutter.
Me and the boys looked at each other..all with the same should we do it look on our faces. Maybe it was the cold air enticing our sweaty brows. We’d been a poorly AC’D truck for a couple hours. Or maybe it was the ice cold drinks she presented in front of us. Whatever the case we followed her through a door behind the front desk and were met with a grand auditorium. It looked as if it could hold maybe 50 people. And all they had was me and my knucklehead friends. As we sat down, sucking down sodas and waters, a mans voice came over the intercom.
“Welcome my friends to the Hibou Timeshare Corporation presentation. Today you will be examining the lifetime of these vessels. Determine whether or not you think they are a smart investment and make a choice if you would like to partake!” I recognized the voice. It was the same shrill tone that I set up the appointment with.
“Now my dear friends, it's time to sit back with your favorite drink...and listen..”
With that, a large projector screen came down from the celine. An old timey countdown began winding down.
BEEP3...BEEP2...BEEP1
From what I can remember, I heard the screams of something...unnatural. A scream so high tone that I felt as if my ears would burst with blood. I tried clasping my hands over my ears but to no avail. The screams were too overpowering. As soon as it started, I passed out.
I awoke looking at the lights on the celine. Unable to sit up. I could tell I was bareass naked on a metal table. I moved my head, the little that i could to see Adam next to me on another table. Naked as the day we were born. He was encased in what looked like a light purple energy field. Looking more in depth, I too had this field in front of me. Before I could speak the tables raised up. Bringing me upright. Bringing me face to face with Tex. To the left of me..Larry. “My friends, I present to you: Terramite 99-0 specimens.” a voice rang out. The same voice from the auditorium.
“They are..of the male species. Strong. Cunning and above all loyal...if raised properly.”
“HEY, you bastards. WTF is this! LET US GO!” Tex cried out. Before he could continue, the energy field tightened around him. Tex let out a scream that will haunt me for the rest of my life. The smell of burned flesh and hair filled the area. I would have puked had the horror of seeing my best friend being burned alive wasn't keeping my attention away from the smell. When the field lifted, Tex was stripped down to the muscle fibers. Hair burned down to the scalp. Tex convulsed until he finally relaxed into a hanging position on the table.
“Now see..specimen is now sedated. Reduced to a weaker position. With the energy field keeping him contained and the Auto-Reversal Time Warp engaging, we can have this specimen back into working shape immediately.”
There was an electrical hum in the air. As before my eyes, Tex’s skin began to heal. His hair growing back. And all burns subsiding. It was as if nothing had happened to him. He still hung in limbo, but we could see the breath return to his chest.The rest of us let out bits of gasps of horror and astonishment.
I could see Adam crying a bit in the corner of my eyes.
A figure appeared from behind me. A tentacle graced my shoulder, not even phased by the force field. I caught sight of the creature. It stood around 7foot tall. Skin that looked human but a head that was elongated. No nose. And eyes that were black as coal. It had two tentacles for hands. I could not see its feet, as it was covered by a long gown.
Larry screamed in anger. “Your...your...a...a…” he managed to get out before the creature silenced him.
“Shhhh….I am...a salesman is all. Now my friends I will demonstrate the life cycle of the Terramite 99-0’s.”
With that, Larry's forcefield began to hum. Right before my eyes Larry began to get...smaller. Not in stature necessarily, no, but in age. He went from being a young man..to a teenager..to that kid i met in 3rd grade..to an infant. His cries were extremely loud. Unaware of the horrors around him. At that moment I could hear Adam's field begin to hum.
“Please no! Please!” Adam begged.
“If you will direct your attention to our third pod:”
Adam then began to scream as he went from a young man..to middle aged man...to retirement age and finally...to a decrepit old man. Hair as white as snow. Wrinkled beyond recognition. Each breath looking to nearly be his last.
“From birth to the declining ages of 70 and beyond the Auto-Reversal Time Warp pods are the perfect tool to use when training your armys, your children, your slaves. Imagine...never having to replace workers. Never worrying if your training methods or punishments might go too far. Never losing a prisoner to death. And though the Terramites look to be difficult to control, I can guarantee their cooperation once put through the proper training.” The creature said. Full of glee in his dead eyes.
Between the crying of baby larry and incoherent babbling of old man adam, the room felt like it was spinning. Just when I thought things couldn't get any stranger, the rest of the lights came to life. The room we were in were surrounded by seats, similar to the ones we sat in. However, sitting in these seats were ghastly creatures of different varieties. Some looked like the salesman creature. Others were ogreish. Large bodied creatures covered in a film of slime. Some of them even looked human. It was the eyes though...their eyes were a teal color with white pupils. Many many creatures looked up me and my friends. All of them began clapping their hands and cheering in unison. The claps were deafening. The cries of the baby felt as if a baseball bat was ramming my head. Adams babbling was terrifyingly disturbing. And Tex...hanging there. Eyes rolled back into his skull. I couldnt imagine the hell he began to feel. At this point I wondered what awaited my fate. The clapping stopped abruptly.
“Oh...Austin...yes, well if you want to know what fate awaits you just shut your eyes. Shut your eyes and quietly count back from 3.” the creature said...was he reading my mind?
Suddenly the urge to close my eyes overtook me. Almost as if I had no choice, I began counting down. 3….2….1….
Everything went black. I wasn't sure if i was alive or dead...or somewhere in between. I saw nothing but black for what felt like a lifetime. And in an instant...I heard that same shrill scream. Only this time I could not cover my ears. I couldn’t feel my body but I felt an unimaginable amount of pain. As the scream grew to its peak, I slammed my eyes open. Trying to catch my breath.
I was back in the car...we were all back in the car. The engine was on. Shitty ac blasting. The others were still out. I sat up in my seat. Not wanting to move too suddenly. The sun was beating down on us. I looked over at the time on the dash…July 28th 4:34 pm. I reached into my shirt pocket and I found several vouchers for the MGM hotels in Vegas along with $300 dollars. I also found a card that simply read “Hibou Timeshare Corp. would like to thank you for a bit of your time”
The boys came too. All feeling rather groggy.
“We all fell asleep huh?” Adam laughed. “We here?”
They didn't remember a thing. Not one thing. Not going in...not the reception area...not the freaky timeshare presentation...not one bit. I lied...i told them that while they were sound asleep, we arrived a little earlier than expected. The presenter had an emergency and left our vouchers at the front desk and apologized profusely.
“Wow, what a gentleman!” Tex laughed. “We definitely owe it to him to sit through another timeshare, probono.” Larry added.
I think it's safe to say that I will not be returning to this or any other timeshare. As I drove away I could see the building disappear in the rear view mirror.
So if you’re traveling deep within the southwest of the United States and hear an ad for a free vacation that's too good to be true...do yourself a favor..turn off the radio, call into work and ask for some overtime..because nothing is ever given for free.

Unusual Option Activity 06/08/20 EVRI, FTCH, EOG, PDD

The Last of Us 2: A Storytelling Catastrophe -- An Essay

Note
This is part three of a three-part deconstructive analysis of The Last of Us: Part II. Find part one, about Ellie's misrepresentation, here; find part two, about how this game fails to utilize its mechanics to tell its story, here.
The Worst Story Ever Told
So much has been said about The Last of Us: Part II. There are so many holes to pick in its plot that it's like Jesse's skull. A number of very eloquent writers have already done this online. I don’t feel the need to join in.
HOWEVER…
A few things really bug me about the storytelling in this game, and some of them haven’t been dwelled on by others. Here, I would like to illustrate these things, and provide examples on why they’re so offensive. This is the longest, most rambling, and the least important part of the trilogy, but you asked for it, so here it is.
Abby
This is a quote from Neil Druckmann from an interview about Part II:
“You’re already connected to Ellie and Joel from The Last of Us, so we put them through a very tragic event, give you one look at a quest for revenge, and then shift to Abby in order to tell a mirror story of redemption that follows the person who — by killing Joel and avenging her father — has already accomplished what Ellie is trying to do, and is struggling to come to grips with it.”
So the cat’s out of the bag. We play as Abby for the whole second half of the game. Once the perspective swaps, we can be certain that this game is not, as I’ve explained in my other essays, part II Joel is dead and Ellie is MIA for hours and hours. If Abby’s half were meaningfully connected to the first game’s story, this would be different—it isn’t. This is a spinoff, not a sequel.
The core idea here is very strong: two forces, placed in opposition, and you play both sides simultaneously. It’s a great concept for a game. There’s a lot of potential there.
So how did Neil fuck it up?
Dumb people will be tempted to draw parallels between Abby’s story and Ellie’s story. This was clearly the intention of the writers, as cited above. These parallels are false. Abby and Ellie are seeking vengeance for different reasons: Ellie wants justice, Abby wants vengeance.
There is a BIG DIFFERENCE.
The core of the problem is that what Abby does to Joel is inexcusable, and it is not an equal or opposite reaction to what Joel has done to Abby or what Ellie intends to do to Abby when they meet up.
What does Joel do at the end of the first game? He kills Abby’s father. He does this to rescue Ellie, a fact which Abby is fully aware of. Is this wrong? Maybe. Is it subjectively justifiable? Yes. This is killing, effectively, in self-defense. Even if we don’t agree with it, we can’t say that, were it our loved one in Ellie’s place, we wouldn’t want to do the same. Joel doesn’t kill Abby’s father because he’s angry at what he’s about to do. He doesn’t do it out of anger. In fact, we can’t be certain he would have done it at all, had the surgeon not jumped out in front of him—an armed man—and tried to stop him with a fucking scalpel.
Contrast this to Abby. Abby spends years tracking Joel across the country. She does this not for justice, but for pure petty vengeance. She wants to get back at Joel for taking her father away. This is VERY DIFFERENT than killing someone because they’re between you and a loved one.
Moreover, she kills Joel despite the fact that apparently Joel is now a stand-up guy who rescues hapless travelers from hordes of zombies, and otherwise seems entirely reformed by the start of the game. He wasn't hurting anybody anymore. He's helping people now. He helps her, and she repays him by torturing him to death with a golf club.
Abby's revenge is understandable, but it is not, in any way, justifiable. Under no circumstances, coming out of the first game, can I ever possibly learn to care about her after that. It's just too much. She comes across in this scene as evil. Gleefully. Without a moment’s hesitation. In fact, the character in this scene has effectively nothing at all in common with the character we see at the end of the game; they behave like entirely different people.
Meanwhile, from Ellie's perspective, Abby is still on the loose. Here's a psychotic, jacked-as-shit assassin who goes around murdering people with her team of military maniacs. She's still at large. She's like a serial killer. She needs to die. She needs to be brought to justice. Later on, we learn more about the WLF, and we come to the realization that Abby is also a beneficiary of an absolutely horrible paramilitary organization that should be brought down, which just makes her death seem even more necessary.
(Did anyone else read the notes about the WLF during Ellie's Day 1? They're really, really bad. How come the WLF we see aren't doing any of that bad stuff? Did the writers just forget???)
This is why Neil’s contrast between these characters is false.
While we can all agree that vengeance is self-destructive, you can read Part II in such a way that the themes seem to be condemning the very notion of wanting justice at all. This isn’t how human brains work. Human brains need justice. And torturing an old man, who just saved your life, with a golf club? That is egregious. It demands justice. Above simply being petty, it feels like a stab in the back.
Human beings hate murderers, turncoats, and adulterers on instinct. Abby is all three!
This is emotional, not logical, but storytelling is emotional. You can’t expect us to consume the story like Vulcans. And yet, twelve hours later, guess who we’ll be playing?
First impressions are important. This is why the most influential book in screenwriting is called Save the Cat. It doesn't matter who your protagonist is; if you introduce them saving a cat, we'll like them. This is why Sarah dies at the start of the first game—she is the metaphorical cat that Joel tries, and fails, to save. Sarah’s death establishes empathy with a character who's going to go on to do very, very bad things down the line.
If we were introduced to Joel while he was torturing those two cannibals to death in Winter, nobody would have liked him. We weren’t. We saw him on the day his daughter died. This is very different. Abby doesn't save the cat. Abby murders the father figure. This is bad storytelling if the writers legitimately expect us to like this character later on.
There are so many ways in which they could have accomplished what Neil says they were trying to. There are so many small ways to change this one scene that would fix the entire game.
But the torture of a beloved character? That’s one of those things we can’t forgive. Abby is just bad. She is set up as an irredeemable monster, and my memory isn't short enough to forget that after we learn she has a dog. I wouldn't have liked her even if she had a whole litter!
Neil knew what he was doing in this first scene. He wanted us to feel this anger. I simply don’t understand why he thought we’d be okay with playing this character by the midpoint.
I feel like the big problem with the perspective swap in this game is that Naughty Dog wants us to see the world objectively. “You thought Abby was bad, but look! She’s a human being, just like you!” This rings false for so many reasons, some of which are elucidated in the second part of my review. Leaving game design to the side, can we learn to like Abby if we give her the benefit of the doubt?
Maybe.
WHY SHOULD WE?
Why should we, as players, take the time to learn about her life? Why should we learn to like her? The only answer is because that's what the writers want us to do.
I want you to take a minute right now and realize that every villain is a human being at the end of the day. Even Hitler had a family, just like Abby. Knowing about their troubled upbringing isn't enough to make us empathize, not when the introduction to this character was so profoundly negative.
Moreover, why should we take the time to become immersed within Abby's life? There is no excuse for what she did. It doesn't matter if she's a great person overall, just like it doesn't matter if Hitler loved his puppy or if Jeffrey Dahmer loved his mother. They're still evil.
I think the notion that we should understand the people we hate is a good one, but the reasons given to empathize with Abby in this game simply aren’t good enough. She SADISTICALLY tortures the man who just rescued her TO DEATH.
If she were filled with remorse, as Neil seems to for some reason think she is, maybe it would be different. If she had acted against her own will or better judgement, if she had made a mistake, maybe it would be different. This isn’t how the character is presented. She doesn’t lose any sleep over what she’s done. She mentions Joel to Manny once right at the beginning of her section, and not remorsefully, and then never, ever again. The reasons we’re given for liking her are entirely independent of what she’s actually done in the narrative.
Because Abby doesn't really want anything in this game, does she? Aside from Joel's death, which she gets. She wants...to survive? I mean big stuff, stuff that stretches through the whole game.
Ellie wants justice—good, simple, easy, I can relate (because I also want justice).
Abby wants…nothing. There’s nothing for her to want.
In fact, our whole first day adventuring with her is just filler. We go on a mission that gets sidetracked, then go back home. We go out to find Owen, and despite the fact that Owen seems to make it to his aquarium scot-free every day, we have to kill 125 people on our way there. What's the plot? What is there to root for? We spend the whole second day looking for supplies to save Yara, who dies in a cutscene anyway! Why didn't we just skip right to Day 3?
(The answer, of course, is to build the relationship with Lev. At this Day 2 is moderately effective, but the narrative design is sloppy at best. Things needed to be much more focused.)
This gets into a whole different problem with this game’s story, which is that Abby’s sections and Ellie’s sections have literally no causal relationship to each other. Hollywood cinema’s classical narrative is all about cause and effect. Luke finds R2D2; R2D2 causes Luke to find Obi-Wan; Obi-Wan causes Luke to become a Jedi, etc. Like many of you reading this, I had anticipated this to be what Abby’s sections did: Danny would be someone Ellie killed! You’d be reminded that your actions have consequences!
Nope. Most of our time with Abby is wandering around Seattle with no goal. We never once see Ellie until the end of the game. There is no causal connection whatsoever. The two stories could be happening on different planets for all they interact with each other.
I could've liked Abby if she'd had a strong driving force. Something to relate to. Something like revenge for the death of her father. But Abby gets her revenge before we play as her, basically, and she's left with nothing. We can't have rooting interest in a character if we have nothing to root for. Nothing to root for, no interest. This is basic storytelling stuff. You'll learn it in any creative writing or screenwriting class. Our introduction to her is so weak. We’re simply immersed into a whole new world—of fascist, evil, raiding Wolves, who are established as being very bad and say weird Hunger Games things like a creepy cult to each other—and expected to care.
I didn’t care.
I profoundly didn’t care.
If I wasn’t so invested in the first game, I would have stopped playing at this point. Swapping perspectives and leaving us on a cliffhanger grinds the entire game to a halt, ruins all momentum, and makes the remainder of Abby’s sections feel like a slog. Pushing forward was actively difficult for me. I simply didn’t care. Other writers have spoken on the pacing elsewhere, so I’m not going to dwell on it. I’m more interested in the stuff that’s less obvious here, but the travesty that is this game’s second act pacing is very hard to look past.
The Georgian Parable
I want to tell you a story. In the 19th century, there was a young man from Georgia—the country, not the state—named Joe Jugashvili. He had a very troubled upbringing. His family was miserably poor and all of his siblings died in infancy. His father was an alcoholic and he beat poor Joe and his mother mercilessly. Throughout his childhood he struggled with illness, injury, and homelessness, and it wasn’t until he found religion that he began to show his merit. He became a novice priest. The climate of the day in the Russian Empire was brutal, but he cast away the chains of his youth, and in the end became one of the most important people of the 20th century.
Most people don’t know him as Jugashvili, though. But I’ll bet you’re familiar with his pseudonym.

Stalin. Joseph Stalin.

Understanding Stalin’s upbringing is important. We should try to learn how he became the man he was. We might even be able to make him into a sympathetic character.
But the fact that Stalin had a harsh upbringing does not excuse what he would go on to do. Nobody would argue otherwise. We can understand that life sucks without forgiving him for his crimes against humanity. You could write a compelling film in which we root for a young and troubled Stalin, only for the twist of his true identity to be revealed at the end. It would probably be effective. But it would never excuse his actions, and I would hope that it would never convince anyone that his actions were somehow justified.
If you’ve ever seen Downfall, you might have experienced this for yourself. We come in at the very end of the Third Reich and so we never really see how bad the Nazis are. You almost feel sorry for Hitler. The film does a great job illustrating that even the worst monsters in all of human history were, still, human.
Note that Downfall would NOT work if the opening of the film was in Auschwitz. We would remember that Hitler was evil and never be able to come to care about his problems. In fact, his problems would seem well-deserved. It would be an entirely different movie.
Yet, in effect, this is what Naughty Dog is asking us to do. We’re being asked to empathize with Abby because “she’s a human being, too!”
So was Stalin.
So was Hitler.
So were Ted Bundy and Jeffrey Dahmer.
Do you think those inmates who killed Dahmer were wrong to do so just because he loved his mother? Maybe you think it was wrong because it's a violation of due process or because he was no longer a threat, but do you think that there's something about Dahmer himself that makes killing him wrong?
If you do, seek help.
Everyone is a human, but some people do deserve to die. Revenge fiction relies upon this fact. Based on how she’s introduced in this game, Abby is one of those people. She is irredeemable. Her characterization is too negative. She needs to die for what she’s done—especially considering that “frontier justice” is the best we can hope for in the post-apocalypse.
“But what about Ellie,” I hear you cry. “Ellie is bad too!”
You’re right. Ellie is bad. But she’s only bad in this game. Empathy has been effectively established before we start seeing her do bad things. Our sympathy for Stalin in my hypothetical drama is predicated on us getting to know him before he enslaves half of the USSR’s populations in the GULAG system and revokes NEP and relocates huge numbers of minority populations in brutal death marches, just as how our sympathy for the Germans in Downfall is predicated upon us being shown the people, rather than the politics, behind the NSDAP.
We’re expected to learn about how human Abby is after we see that she’s a fucking psycho. This is why no one likes her.
Where's the conflict?
I like the character of Owen and I like how those scenes at the aquarium are written, but we’re thrust straight into them after barely being given a chance to know the characters. Think about how long it is that you’ve known Ellie in the first game before there’s an entire sequence with no combat, no threats, and nothing but character.
If you’re like me, your first thought is probably within the Left Behind DLC. That’s because moments like those aquarium flashbacks have to be earned. You can’t put them in the game and expect the audience to care, because subjecting us to a sequence without drive, without conflict, and without real gameplay is a luxury. It doesn’t stand alone. It isn’t a substitute for actual character development. An hour in an aquarium flashback is the icing on exploring Abby’s character; it’s not a substitute for the cake itself, and eating it out of context doesn’t do much to tell you about how good the meal as a whole is.
And it’ll MAKE YOU FAT.
Meandering with Ellie after she’s been in one and a half games is fine and forgivable. Meandering as Abby, after seeing her murder Joel, is a death sentence. If we were expected to learn to love Ellie through Left Behind before having played the base game, it wouldn’t work.
This all comes down to conflict. Ellie’s section, despite its enormous flaws, has some kind of central conflict: find Abby. This gives us something to root for. When there’s conflict, we can get behind people who are morally questionable. Abby’s sections have no meaningful conflict. All of that stuff in the aquarium? There is no conflict AT ALL. It’s just, as I’ve said, icing. That might be okay if it was a small portion of a larger game, but it isn’t. Those aquarium scenes are why we’re expected to like Abby. Because…we’re supposed to find her charming, I guess?
You simply cannot write a visual story this way. Maybe a novel, maybe, but not a game or a movie. It violates all of the rules. This isn’t brave or bold or innovative, it’s just inept. A Hollywood film written this way would never get made. The script would never be greenlit.
The State of Nature
In the first game, there's this really jarring time skip between Summer and Fall, where Ellie and Joel just kind of teleport from Pittsburgh to Wyoming. If you're not an American, you may not realize that Pittsburgh and Wyoming are about as far apart as Paris and Moscow. I've always wondered...what happened during all of that time? What adventures did we miss?
This teleportation, however, works for one important reason: the world of The Last of Us is big...and it's mostly empty. This is established beforehand when Joel and Ellie drive from Boston to Pittsburgh; cities are dangerous hotspots, but the countryside at large isn't all that hazardous.
I would now like to contrast this with the second game.
So Ellie and Dina and also Jesse and Tommy, and Abby and her friends, teleport freely from Jackson to Seattle. Well, okay, maybe it's just empty, I can maybe live with that. It does seem a little hard to buy, though, especially because zombies in this game wander around the US like WWZ hordes, but whatever.
Okay. Now we're in Seattle.
Seattle, apparently, is SO DANGEORUS, that when Abby wants to go visit Owen at his aquarium, she has to have AN ENTIRE DAY of gameplay to get there. Well, this is the apocalypse. I can buy that. It's probably pretty dangerous.
I need to emphasize this point. The entirety of Abby's first day has no narrative. Its sole purpose is to show the player how incredibly violent and dangerous this world is.
And then the game forgets.
When Abby finally discovers the bodies of Mel and Owen, I was amped for a scene in which we played as her tracking Ellie across Seattle. That sounded so badass. It would've been really cool.
Instead, Abby teleports to the theatre.
So do they all. Everyone just teleports to wherever they need to go, despite the fact that we spend AN ENTIRE DAY establishing that this world is so dangerous that we need to have hours of gameplay just to talk a stroll down the street.
Obviously all of that shit is just filler. It has no bearing on the story. But this bothers me so, so much. There's no internal logic to the narrative. It's all so jarring.
The Seraphites
Weird post-apocalypse religious fundamentalists are a horrible cliche. You're telling me that a bunch of Amish psychopaths have set up shop in Seattle, and had massive success, preaching that technology is evil...despite the fact that most of them were probably born in our modern, secular age? Really?
Is this a joke??
Seriously. The Seraphites are like something out of Fallout. They don't fit with The Last of Us' aesthetic. I'm once again left wondering if Neil actually played the first game.
WLF vs. The Seraphites
Abby's section concludes with a big dumb boring pointless stupid action scene in which you ride a horse with Lev through a warzone. I have some questions about this sequence that I'd really like help answering.
1. Why are all of the buildings uniformly on fire?
Do the WLF have mortars? Did they drop napalm? Why is every house on fire at the same time? Who set all of these fires? Why?
2. How did the WLF uniformly distribute themselves across an entire island during an invasion?
Didn't they, like, have to land somewhere first? Did they parachute in??
3. Why is the Space Needle on an island?
The Space Needle is not on an island.
If anyone has answers to these questions, let me know in the comments below. I'd ask Neil but he'd block me on Twitter if I tried.
A Story Backwards
I don't want to harp on about the pacing any more than I have to, but I would like to point out that the presentation of this game's story is engineered to create player apathy. We're expected to immerse ourselves into the lives of Mel and Owen after we've found out that Ellie kills them all pointlessly in a cutscene. All throughout this review I've said "why should we care?" Well, this right here is an enormous reason why we SHOULDN'T. We know how it ends. There's no mystery, there's no tension. Why get invested in Owen's story when we KNOW that it doesn't go anywhere?
The answer is...you don't.
If Ellie's and Abby's sections could have been told side-to-side, the entire game would have worked so much better. Owen's death would have been much more impactful if we actually gave a shit about him when he died. We'd maybe even hold it against Ellie for what she's just done. But Neil needed the swap to Abby to be a big surprise, so a story constructed in the least intuitive way possible is what we got.
The End
A common criticism of this game’s finale is that Abby gets away mostly intact, despite the fact that she successfully enacted her vengeance, while Ellie fails to carry her vengeance through…and yet also loses everything in the process.
If you honestly thought Ellie was going to kill Abby in the end, you are a stupid person. That was never on the table as far as I’m concerned. That climax would go against this game’s thematic purpose, clearly. In fact, I thought both characters would be captured by the Rattlers (in cutscenes), then forced to work together to escape—thereby coming to a new understanding, and parting ways on equitable terms. That really would have driven the humanizing message of the game home, I think.
Instead, we got the game’s actual ending.
Generally, in narrative, stories have what we call themes. Themes are the moral lessons that your character must learn in order to overcome the antagonist at the climax, thereby reaching a new stasis. Every good story does this in some respect. If you honestly can reject this premise, you have no idea what you’re talking about and have never studied storytelling to any extent whatsoever. Everything needs a theme, no matter how basic. We tell stories to learn about the world around us; the theme is what’s being taught.
In a tragedy, the character fails to learn the theme in time, or does so only after it’s too late, and is punished for it. Tragedies are about people who make the wrong decisions. This is where catharsis comes from. In a more conventional modern story, the character learns the theme and is rewarded. She gets the girl, saves the day, wins the game—whatever.
At the end of The Last of Us: Part II, Ellie makes the correct decision. She breaks the cycle of violence. She frees herself from her hatred. AND SHE IS STILL PUNISHED FOR IT!
This is so wrong. It’s wrong in every way. Part II would be a decent, albeit very sloppy, tragedy if Ellie got what she wanted at the expense of all she had. That’s the traditional revenge arc—Hamlet, Monte Cristo, Sweeney Todd, whatever.
But Ellie makes the right decision! She learns the theme! She doesn’t get what she wants, she loses everything she has, and she’s left with nothing at all.
Worst of all, her fear has been realized: she is now totally alone in the world. She has nothing to live for. This would be perfect…if she’d actually taken her vengeance. She doesn’t take her vengeance. Therefore, this doesn’t work.
It seems like Neil has forgotten that the point of storytelling is to teach us and not the characters. It doesn’t matter if Ellie “perpetuates the cycle of violence;” the point is that WE learn from her mistakes. WE learn about the cycle of violence. This is the whole idea behind every single one of Shakespeare’s tragedies.
The entire thematic purpose of the game falls flat on this point. For one, if Ellie had simply killed Lev and Abby, the cycle of violence would have ended. There was no one left to come after her. Two, the person who fails to learn this specific theme about vengeance is the one who gets the ‘happy’ (although still pretty shitty) ending!
Remember when I mentioned justice earlier? This ending violates the audience’s sense of justice, and it’s possible to read its events as actually condoning violence. I mean on the most primal level possible. If Ellie is going to be punished despite making the right decision, she might as well have made the wrong one, right? Why not? It’s not like she has anything else to lose. I know, I know, somethingsomething about forgiving Joel or whatever, or she maintains her humanity. That’s not good enough.
As the audience, the message we take away is that murder is bad—which I think I knew already—and that pursuing vengeance is also bad. Well, so is eating candy and playing video games; we do it because it makes us feel good. It’s entirely human, particularly when your existence is haunted by PTSD nightmares that mean you can’t ever return to normalcy until achieving closure. The pursuit of this closure is so bad, apparently, that even repenting—and losing two of your fingers for it—isn’t enough. Simply making the mistake is worthy of punishment.
If you take only one thing away from this essay, I want it to be a realization of how fucking wrong this is.
Zombieland
The Last of Us is a series about zombies. Nobody calls them that, but we all know it. With that said, the game works hard to make its “infected” seem more than what they are. There’s been an effort to give their appearance a realistic justification—the cordyceps fungus has made the jump to man, and it is our reckoning. There is at least the façade that this is a story of Man vs. Nature, and that the zombies we’re facing down have a lifecycle, a biological reason to exist, and that they’re just another form of life. The notion in the apocalypse that “life finds away” is one that, thematically, I think is extremely relevant to the first game. Man has left Salt Lake City, but giraffes now roam free. The streets are abandoned, but foliage reclaims what was once taken away. The fall of civilization isn’t actually the end; it’s just the end of us. This is The Last of Us, remember, not The Last of Them or The End of the World. The world is doing just fine. In fact, it’s better than ever. It’s just us on the out. Even the “zombies” aren’t necessarily bad. All hosts think their parasites are bad, but that doesn’t mean they’re evil. They just are. They exist to propagate themselves.
For some reason I expected the sequel to lean more heavily into this aspect. I was wrong. Naughty Dog has demonstrated they had no interest whatsoever in this thematic point. Instead, cordyceps infected humans are just zombies. No effort has been made to naturalize them in Part II. In fact, now they travel in hordes! They attack en masse! They wait for victims passing by under the snow banks! In short, they’re zombies. World War Z zombies, no less.
I’ve always wondered: how does the supply of infected keep growing? Cannibalism and parasitism don’t go very well together. Anytime someone gets infected, they’re either eaten or their infector is killed. This is not very good for population sustainability!
But The Last of Us is not, nor has it ever been, particularly concerned with the logistics of the apocalypse. And that’s fine. It doesn’t have to be. It isn’t about the world. It’s about Joel and Ellie.
…or so we all thought. But if Abby’s sections aren’t about this fucked up world, then they truly do have nothing. This is yet another inconsistency. I appreciate that the game has ditched generic human enemies of “hunters,” replacing them with factions that have real personality—a little bit like the difference between Fallout 3 and New Vegas—but I lament the decision to turn the infected into pure monsters. I feel like it misses the point. The Last of Us is a natural disaster, not a supernatural or scientific one. And yet face down the Rat King—basically, a big fucking zombie undead monster. Great. The entire art style is the reclamation of urbanity by nature, but apparently the infected are no longer natural. What’s the point, then? Why not just have them be demons? Why pretend they’re cordyceps-infected at all? Because it makes them look freaky?
The brilliance of the first game's infected is an idea just left in the ether. Now no one will ever be able to explore those themes in the medium of zombie fiction, because cordyceps fungus is so distinctively TLoU and I don’t think there’s any better way to have a zombie virus that’s also natural. I so desperately want to write a zombie story set in this series’ universe to capitalize on what I think is there, and now the entire thing has been ruined. We will never get what was so easily within reach.
What Went Wrong?
I want to conclude this series with a discussion of what went wrong with this game. How did we go from The Last of Us, which still inspires new players with its brilliance even seven years later, to The Last of Us: Part II, which is about as intelligently written and designed as an actual spore of cordyceps fungus?
It's not a difficult question to answer, actually. They made Neil VP.
And it's really that simple. In Hollywood, it's nigh unheard of to concentrate both creative and financial powers into the hands of a single person. Outside of the greatest auteurs in the field--Francis Ford Coppola, Orson Welles--no one can handle that kind of responsibility alone. Filmmaking is a collaborative process, and you need multiple perspective to make a good product.
Game development is even more collaborative than film. It lives and breathes on harmony between the different branches of the developer. Bruce Straley was a check and balance against Neil's ineptitude. Straley managed to turn Neil's obvious bad ideas into great ones.
But then Straley left, and we're left with only Neil in charge...and now he's VP. So he has all of the creative control, and no one can question him, because he's also the boss. He answers to no one but himself. Dare to say "hey Neil, the pacing sucks?" You're putting your job at risk. This is how people like Tommy Wiseau make movies like The Room: they have nobody to answer to except themselves.
That is a horrible position to be in. Even good writers need external forces to filter out the bad ideas. Giving your director full creative control means that all of the bad ideas get thrown into the pot, even if everyone else realizes that it's a mistake. It takes a true genius, like Orson Welles, to avoid catastrophe.
Finally, I would like to make the controversial statement that Neil Druckmann is NOT Orson Welles, and add on that even Orson made some really shitty movies over the course of his career.
The True Tragedy Was Inside Us All Along
I think Part II is one of gaming's greatest tragedies. Never has so much potential been so horribly wasted. But it was almost fated. The odds that someone made a game as good as The Last of Us were 100%. The odds that Naughty Dog in particular could do it twice were basically 0%. What we got was even worse than I'd imagined, but I can't say I'm all that surprised.

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